How Does One Cope With This Unhealthy Coworker


Toxic Workplace Environment How To Deal With a Toxic Work Environment

Video taken from the channel: Professor Heather Austin


how to deal with coworkers who think they are your boss: 3 power tactics + Danger phrases

Video taken from the channel: Online Communication Skills Training Courses


Office Politics How to Deal with Difficult People at Work

Video taken from the channel: Linda Raynier


Dealing With Back stabbers At Work

Video taken from the channel: Cameron Morrissey



Video taken from the channel:


How to Deal with Toxic, Jealous, Insecure Coworkers

Video taken from the channel: Linda Raynier


How to Deal with Difficult People | Jay Johnson | TEDxLivoniaCCLibrary

Video taken from the channel: TEDx Talks

This is tough. Whether you have one co-worker who complains, or you’re the only healthy one in an entire office of unhealthy complainers, it’s really tough to stay positive when those around you are negative. These people keep saying “I should do this” and then do nothing or “I tried that and it didn’t work” when in reality they didn’t actually put any effort towards really trying.

A bad coworker isn’t just annoying, they can actually be detrimental to your career. His or her behavior can make you feel constantly stressed, which. Here are four steps you can take to deal with a toxic coworker: Have an honest, candid conversation with the person. If you don’t attempt to do thi.

So how do you deal with this type of coworker? Changing how you react mentally, or using psychological tricks, can significantly help, says Sutton, organizational psychologist and the author of. However, there are lots of ways to deal with a coworker who acts more like your boss in the moment. Let your coworker know how you feel. You’re equals, so don’t be intimidated.

Tell him your. Gossip is the root of many problems within the office walls, becoming a breeding ground for negativity and escalating emotions. As in your personal life, the only way to deal with trash talk.

Send your manager updates. If someone is trying to take credit for your work, giving your manager frequent project updates where possible, so they know who is responsible for each task, will make it more difficult for a sneaky coworker to steal your spotlight, says Domeyer. Avoid gossip. Don’t let a difficult co-worker get your head in a tizzy.

Instead, use the above tips to deal with the situation like a BOSS! If you could use some support when dealing with a difficult co-worker, or if you’re looking to switch jobs, Work It Daily can help you!However, if you got into a sudden argument with a coworker, it’s best to wait until both of you have calmed down and can have a level-headed conversation. You won’t gain anything by forcing a.

Dealing with difficult people is easier when the person is just generally obnoxious or when the behavior affects more than one person. You can team together to address the behavior or inform management and Human Resources staff to get help addressing the employee issue before it.

List of related literature:

I tell her one of two things: either she can analyze her work habits, see where she’s being remiss, and improve her performance, or, if she firmly believes that the criticism by her supervisor is unwarranted, she can tell her supervisor that and demonstrate why.

“Imzadi” by Peter David
from Imzadi
by Peter David
Simon & Schuster UK, 2012

The one who demands too much of your time: This is probably the most consistently annoying type of employee, but the important thing to remember about this person is that she is simply an attention-starved human being, so it has very little to actually do with you.

“When's Happy Hour?: Work Hard So You Can Hardly Work” by Betches
from When’s Happy Hour?: Work Hard So You Can Hardly Work
by Betches
Gallery Books, 2019

She could sort out her internal feelings of self-worth driving her behaviors and leading her to make assumptions about her co-workers.

“10 Steps to Successful Mentoring” by Wendy Axelrod
from 10 Steps to Successful Mentoring
by Wendy Axelrod
American Society for Training & Development, 2019

Reporting a coworker is never an easy task.

“Foundations and Adult Health Nursing” by Kim Cooper, RN, MSN, Kelly Gosnell, RN, MSN
from Foundations and Adult Health Nursing
by Kim Cooper, RN, MSN, Kelly Gosnell, RN, MSN
Elsevier Health Sciences, 2014

(When confronted, she denied her hostility, instead insisting that her question merely reflected her concern that her coworker’s busy schedule was keeping her from being as good to herself as she should be, and possibly ruining her health.)

“Distancing: Avoidant Personality Disorder” by Martin Kantor
from Distancing: Avoidant Personality Disorder
by Martin Kantor
Praeger, 2003

Environment: Colleagues avoid her and walk away from her.

“Cognitive Therapy of Personality Disorders, Third Edition” by Aaron T. Beck, Denise D. Davis, Arthur Freeman
from Cognitive Therapy of Personality Disorders, Third Edition
by Aaron T. Beck, Denise D. Davis, Arthur Freeman
Guilford Publications, 2015

Don’t tell your colleague that she’s a disgusting slob; just let her know that the clutter she’s leaving on the table is interfering with your ability to do your work.

“Fundamentals of Management with Student Resource Access 12 Months” by Danny Samson, Richard L Daft, Timothy Donnet
from Fundamentals of Management with Student Resource Access 12 Months
by Danny Samson, Richard L Daft, Timothy Donnet
Cengage Learning Australia, 2017

Speak up and let this person know they have to pull their own weight.

“The Ultimate Dictionary of Dream Language” by Briceida Ryan
from The Ultimate Dictionary of Dream Language
by Briceida Ryan
Hampton Roads Publishing, 2013

Boundaries and documentation are your best defense against toxic coworkers.

from “Don’t You Know Who I Am?”: How to Stay Sane in an Era of Narcissism, Entitlement, and Incivility
by Ramani S. Durvasula Ph.D
Post Hill Press, 2019

If you work with someone who is indulging his or her habitual patterns and neuroses in this way, you should try to find a supportive way to speak with this person.

“Work, Sex, Money: Real Life on the Path of Mindfulness” by Chögyam Trungpa, Carolyn Rose Gimian, Sherab Chodzin Kohn
from Work, Sex, Money: Real Life on the Path of Mindfulness
by Chögyam Trungpa, Carolyn Rose Gimian, Sherab Chodzin Kohn
Shambhala, 2011

Alexia Lewis RD

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and Certified Heath Coach who believes life is better with science, humor, and beautiful, delicious, healthy food.

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  • M just going through this kind of phase n feeling anxious so searched for technique to deal with such issue n m shocked to find soo many ppl alike me suffering from same issue across the world. Its every where. M strong believer in live n let live; however i feel ppl with this motto suffers a lot.. Don’t understand why why ppl tend to be like this, competitive/ insecure/ backbiting.. We have one life then why cant we just spread love, equality.., in this covid 19 pandemic, when all of us should stand together, help one another;i fond everyone serving personal goal only.. Nobody bothers, be it politicians, employers.. Lets all of us pray for a secured and lovable environment around.. I pray for peace

  • Dear Dan, I am extremely sensitive, (I’ve got adhd) and I am working a temporary job and I am working in a warehouse and extremely clumsy. There isn’t a lot of space and I’m forever saying sorry for getting in someone’s way. How can I be polite without being a doormat for getting in someone’s way?

  • Please do not take this man’s advice because this man is assuming that people are basically good and that is just not the case. This is from my 48 years of experience most people when it comes down to it are mean backstabbing humans and that’s probably 99% Again from my personal experience. The best thing to do is just keep your mouth shut and look for another job or just keep your mouth shut because if they tell on you once and you confront them they’re going to go tell on you again. I know that from experience and because management don’t care it’s whoever tattles first…… is going to side with them. This is very bad advice. I am not trying to offend anyone this is just the life experience that I have had. And I do not hang out with criminals nor people that do drugs I don’t hang out with anybody at work or at home.

  • Your are better than them, and they want to make you feel bad. The only best revenge is ignore them and be a better you make them CRAZY

  • I’ve had a coworker straight up say to me they are afraid of confrontation and approaching people. They are supposed to be in charge of other people. Have had multiple instances where they talk shit behind my back because they’re too pussy to talk to me straight up. It’s absolutely infuriating.

  • Workplace ain’t high school. You’re there to make money, not friends. Keep your work life completely separate from personal life, just like oil and water don’t mix. Constructive confrontation is the manliest thing a man can do and the most professional work ethic.

  • Great video. Thank you. I have also recorded a video on toxic people and how to deal with them. Check it out on my channel. Peace.

  • Thank you so much ❤️. In a world of entitled high heel wearing morons that I work with, in the end of the day when s*** hits the fan, I will be blameless because I know I’ve done my part.

  • What an excellent explanation and depiction of the problem at hand. I feel much more clear that I’ve been doing the right thing by being firm and confronting them on these things.

  • And then there’s one other archetype, the person who can’t pronounce archetype (ark-ee-type), in this case it’s the guy presenting this Ted Talk.

  • I felt backstabbed at work recently. The situation was during review time with the “big boss” it was addressed that I was constantly making mistakes doing a particular task. I have no issue with someone telling me what I’m doing wrong or what I did wrong, but it was never addressed to me. So when the big boss told me about it I felt totally blindsided. Communication is the key. Don’t go behind someone’s back and tell someone else what they’re doing wrong; tell the person. The manager that did this also did it to his secretary as well. The following day the both of us were very annoyed that there was no discussion with either one of us except to go behind our back and give a negative report about job performance. Not very professional at all.

  • Office politics isn’t this black and white. This is great advice if you’re working at one company and terrible advice if you’re at another company.

  • How about how to deal with people who are your Seniors in a team in which you are the most junior person and the only woman on the team? How can a woman deal with men who are barking orders on a regular basis?

  • It is horrible. You can’t win. Do well and they hate you, meeting you with anger, put-downs and passive-aggressive behaviour. Tone it down and be ‘average’, and they smirk and crow about themselves. Make a mistake and they are ecstatic! Try to ignore them, and they cry loudly about how mean and cruel you are.

  • The backstabbing occur because they are contract and they attack permanent employees. Management love it because they want conflict to get more dirt out of each employee

  • it’s good to remember people are people see them as the man, woman, wife, mother, husband, father, daughter, son that they are and find some common ground football, kids, cooking that will make the relationship more human

  • Take breaks? Not allowed any breaks. Going to the bathroom was met with criticism. Not kidding. Welcome to Healthcare environment.
    I’m well grounded so I’m not feeling overly concerned about the ocpd and bullying. I take the time I need to collect my thoughts and see them as unwilling to look in the mirror. They have their insecurities, it’s just not my vocation or will to take care of them. I care for myself first so I can offer to my patients. I live by a simple rule of reciprocity. If an employer can’t offer the minimum of care, I don’t feel I owe loyalty to the business or the motivation to return care. The key word is “return”. There needs to be give and take, not just take.

  • That is true we often did not try to use active listening skill, also we did not be patient to know what others mean.
    Communications skills nowadays everything’s.
    And were health are really matter. So we need to talk and Express what we feel with a good way and without stress and anger.

  • Anyone who claims “you can’t sit out office politics” is one of the trolls who consistently tries to drag other people into their drama. Office politics are, in fact, best avoided and ignored altogether. The most successful people are those who cultivate connections to the right people, i.e. people in positions of influence and power who can mentor and advance a career. The fact is that 80-90% of the people in any given office are placeholders who really don’t matter in the scheme of things.

  • Interviewer ask me..what kind of co -worker can’t work with?? my answer directly word, if effecting is not concern with work and my life, I can ignore their action….Do you have any suggestions else??

  • Another excellent video! I have been using YouTube for a long time and you are the first person I have ever wanted to subscribe. Congrats on receiving my first subscription!

  • I can identify my current workplace one of biggest organization is definitely ALL those words you described as perfect toxic workplace

  • Hi, I loved this! I used to be in management, my former boss gave me the best advice, she said, you don’t have to be bossy to be a great boss, and never ask someone to do something you aren’t willing to do yourself. This was for me, invaluable, office or workplace dynamics are very challenging! Plus love your uplifting advice, we should all feel like we have stood on the shoulders of giants. ���� Suze U.K. X

  • Great video, but I have a question…what if they jelous of me? Ok, I’ll try to understand them and their feelings, but I should underperform for myself just because they jelous? I like to work it hard and I like to learn new things. I should always focus on their feelings before I do anything? Because this is what I’m doing now and it’s really sucks for me honestly… ��

  • Jay Johnson you are dapper lad. A sharp dresser ready for gymnastics. You have the moves. I bet you could dance around
    any difficult person. I enjoyed your talk. My favorite response to attack statements is: “That’s interesting. Why do you think or say that?” Active listening is what I think you are promoting. I enjoy debates but many people don’t so I try to be discerning.

  • Finding a new job? They are there as well. Here, there & everywhere, just like what The Beatles says. It’s gonna be easier if you just make your own business, but that might also be finding toxic customers.

  • Is to learn how to not be difficult with yourself first other people are difficult and if they are you have to discipline them put them in their place hold them accountable for their mistakes met lots of difficult people throughout the years the only person you are responsible for your behaviour others aren’t your problem people that don’t treat you well and great you wrong need to held accountable should let others had behaviour impact I your ��

  • After dealing with a toxic coworker for a few years, I am totally broken. It’s been almost 10 years since I last worked with this person, and I have never been the same. I have been fearful of people ever since. I have been paranoid of people and their intentions ever since. I am doing everything I can to be able to work from home and never have to work with people ever again. I can’t take anymore.

  • Narcissistic people / Emotional Imbalaced Co-workers or Clients is a challenge because is a matter of dancing around their twisted emotions… Intuition (if you are not crazy) works as a warning to be aware of those difficult people.

  • How do I boost my confidence after my supervisor disrespected me? do you have a video on this subject? I would appreciate it if you have one to post it. Thank you for your time.

  • Thank you so much. I fit more the insecure type and I have changed it over the last couple of months, therefore you are completely right. You are beautiful overall and I thank you for being a Blessing.

  • I work with tattletails and snowflakes. I cant say anything or have a opinion. If I do coworkers run to the team managers. I knew of someone who called the managers, henchmen with good reason. I am buying some time I really feel I need a change next year. Thx for you video.

  • This behavior should illegal. We as a society have made these monsters by letting them get their way. Sick. It’s like a child crying in the store you either give in and buy them whatever or take them to the car and they get nothing. We rewarded these people for too long by letting this awful behavior go on. Managers should know who the real narcissistic people are and they are the ones to be on the line. Because usually it are the kind natured employees getting the shaft everyday, for saying it’s not right and voicing it. Just a sad world that wasn’t always like this. We need to crack down on the real bullies at work everyone knows who they are they are just scared of them. Not me I stand up to the bullies. If we all did this they couldn’t hide amongst us anymore. Don’t be afraid… Stand up and let everyone know we won’t stand there and take it. ��

  • I think these types of people are the main reason for high unemployment. They should be identified and separated from the work force and given different jobs with the proper help for whatever cluster b issue they suffer from. Otherwise the country goes in ruins as that is how some countries were undone.

  • The 19 year co work got me send home today his cause trouble all the time how many time I’ll told boss his doesn’t do anything but pat him on back

  • Hard work I always proved that but Supervisors still not please with that, because she loved gossip and hang around with bullied person in my department.

  • You don’t I wish people would stop dealing with all the destructive people in society’s and let the hang out to rot and stop creating thier spawn get rid of them all.

  • I’m a huge fan of you, Dan! Your videos have helped improve my communication skills and made them more effective! This video was especially relevant in light of some experiences I’ve had in the past few weeks.

  • offices are full of scumbags. narcissists, psychopaths…and they are the ones who get promoted every time they throw their coworkers under the bus, or sabotage your work.

  • Management usually supports the narcissists and toxic people. Never tell management about what is happening, just smile, sharpen your resume and look for another job.

  • Hi Linda. How about case no.1, where you started to understand them but they keep coming on you, gang bully and sort off.
    In my case, the managers and other co-workers really like me but my 2 out of 5 immediate team members who always bad mouthing about me.

  • I finally understood this when I realized that one of our more senior employees was sabotaging my performance. Now I am producing 10x better no thanks to them. They pretend to be kind and helpful. They were also assigned by the supervisor as the ‘next in charge’ even though they weren’t officially promoted. Screw these people, they KILL careers. Glad to get this off my chest and move on from this nonsense.

  • If you are black and a woman, Americans will promote them. The culture of guilt and some disordered view have isolated the competent white male. I hope admitting blacks with low grades into ivy league schools will stop.

  • I was called a bully for saying, we have our big girl pants on to a colleague…to me that is not a kernel of truth of me being a bully so I disagree there is a kernel of truth when dealing with a backstabbed. He has a reputation of being a backstabber and not me.

  • Im now in a healthy workplace surrounded by supports & care. It is difficult to adjust after years being hostile, back biting work place. I find myself over thinking and having problem to open up.

  • i’m 18,just got my first part-time job as a cashier at a local burger joint. from the moment i stepped it, i noticed two of the main cooks are quite aggressive and are constantly nagging about something. they also speak spanish to each other (which i barley know) so it makes everything worse because i know they’re making comments about me or the other cashier when we make small mistakes but we can’t understand what they’re saying. these men that are cooks are in their late 40s and act so petty and immature. it’s already so toxic and i’ve only been there for a month and a half.:/

  • Another GREAT resource is a piece titled The Hatchet Man’s Playbook a LOT of eye-popping, non-obvious stuff! Can’t recommend it highly enough!

  • Hi,
    I don’t know what to do or how to survive. Quitting is for me no option since i’m appentice and i need to do practice for another 1,5 year. I make this internship abroad, and i speak level c1 but i still get critisizm from colleagues because of my german. My boss is psyhco, He insults and accuses the coworker and even the customers sometimes. For example,Today, he sent me to pick up his order from a shop. It was’nt there yet and he should receive an Email when it arraives anyway. I could buy just few pieces from the item he’ve ordered. As i got back, he asked how did the shop look like because he didn’t belive that i was therebased on his idea, that he can see online that this item is in stock. But pls, he could check the receip i brought from the store but no, he accuses that i’m so stupid that i was in the wrong shop. Similar stories everyday…
    Btw, he stutters. I’m trying to look at it that he’s trying to look powerful, but he is a stutter and this may cause so much fustration that he needs to hurt the people around him? Anyway, it hurts very much every day and the colleauges (the newsest not yet) kind of accepted how they’re going to be treated by him and this is even more harmful because they communicated by this that this is NORMAL!!!?!

  • Sorry but I don’t agree with the second part. We all have insecurities but when we act positive and do what’s best for the company, toxic people still attack. I agree it’s not personal though.

  • Tried all this crap and sometimes these jealous people are the problem. Its so annoying especially when you’ve exhausted all the options that’s been presented.

  • What i dont like about this video?

    Psst Dan, just wanted to say your an amazing person. And thank you for these life saving knowledge you share. Yeah I repeat, life saving.

  • Thank you for sharing your honest truth! Some of us need and appreciate honesty that’s not so cookie cutter and P.C. ❤️
    I also want to add that sometimes changing your environment can be exactly what u need

  • What to do if my subordinate is disrespectful and always go behind my back and talk to me line manager? My manager does not realize it’s a big issue.

  • How do I tell my therapist to stop yelling at me and telling me how much she hates me. Totally abusive. Help. I have been very nice to her.

  • Gracias por compartir, interesante tema.todo depende de uno,creer o no creer,aceptar o rechazar, mejorar o empeorar.ten la seguridad de elegir.

  • My observation at work is that insecure or toxic workers who have things to say about others tend to group together. This doesn’t surprise me at all, as they would not have the confidence to do it alone.

  • This us good for people who are normal but there is a higher level when you’re dealing with personality disorder and instability. I worked with someone like that who was a higher level than me and I wrote Statements to their boss when it was extreme. Like severe bullies real world ur doesn’t go right away because if once they’ll start pushing boundaries again. It took me 4 Statements to finally have some correction and it’s still a fragile truce. So the thing I say with some difficult people us learn you deserve basic respect and from there set boundaries. BOUNDARIES ok. Lastly it’s not your problem it’s there’s but self observe to make sure you don’t contribute. Be happy you aren’t them.

  • I learned some about this video, about my situation that happened over 2 years ago, at work. As a leader at work ( in some ways ), I clouded my friendship with my leadership role, and I expected my associate to understand similar thinking, as I saw her as a competent person. So I expected her to understand that we were a team. I always thought that my supervisory role didn’t matter, as we both did important roles in our department that resulted in OUR success ( from my view, I just happened to hold the supervisory title, and I can never do this alone ). Also, I treated her as a friend at work, and I never thought of her as my employee. What I’m learning is that I think she understood that we are like boss and associate, thus 2 very different feelings, as she eventually distanced herself from me. I think she misinterpreted my friendship / acknowledgment of our success, to mean something ELSE!!! Thank you for this video. It helped to open my eyes to others thoughts, and my understanding of others.

  • KEYS FOR OFFICE WARFARE: get the secretaries and other front-office staff on YOUR side!!! Relate, be kind, and brind donuts at random times!!!

    that way when you’re plotting something on an asshole co-worker, they’ll be more apt to help with office tricks and random acts of revenge. ��

  • I never thought I’d be watching a video like this but imma try this! I feel better now as I write this and having watched this video. Thanks!

  • I felt & understood every word of yours. Conpelling ans usual. U have an extra ordinary way to see & analyze things around. I was just thinking in the same way u gave me that confidence that yes! I do realize things correctly especially towards toxic & negative people in general.

  • I couldn’t handle my software development workplace.

    I would have never thought that grown men could be so immature and racist, it reminded me of high school.

    I left after 10 months, I’ve decided to start my own company instead so that I don’t have to deal with people’s bullshit, humans are fucked, aye.

  • I just stay focused 110 percent on my job now. If they hate me, I still help them get their job done. Eventually some of them stopped hating me once they realized that I am not a one upper or a kiss ass. They ended up realizing that I am just a hard worker who likes to work because it makes the time go by faster and because I want my company to succeed. I think of us as a team and I try to find ways to make everybody else’s work ethic the same or better than mine.

  • Also favoritism plays by the manager too. When you think you only have to deal with toxic coworkers you have the managers who take their side secretly. What I do know though is that when that happens enough is enough. I don’t Care if I work less than a year or so somebody says to. If it’s breaking me mentally and physically. I’m leaving life is too short to worry about a bunch of nobodies who you’ll forget in 3 weeks.

  • This video provides some good advice, but the comment about “life being a mirror” is erroneous. I have always been a very confident person at work and never had any concerns about my co-workers prior to my current work situation. When you are “the complete package”, you will trigger the majority of the employees in one way or another.

  • Yep, one toxic worker can sink the whole team. I used to avoid people like this but now I confront it. They actually back down if you are firm and determined.

  • Am in medical school my lasy semester actually and my boss hates me and two othe coworkers i heard them discussing about me, they hate my skin colour, they wrote painful stuff stuff about me, they favor others because of their colour, i have worked hard despite loosing two pregnancies, despite having a childish boyfriend, despite moving to another country and learning anew language, i am not perfect but i want to scream at her but I can’t because u respect and honor hee

  • This is a great topic and one I can very much relate to before I left my Corporate job last year! Taking a walk, getting out of the building for lunch and writing in a gratitude journal were my best ways of coping with my environment.

  • There is no excuse for bad behavior. I’m surprised this video did not offer more practical solutions like confronting your bullies not aggressively but meeting with them and making your concerns heard.

  • Dude wtf!! Enough of the touch a feely shit! Rules are #1 clearly defined of chain of command! #2 treat people the way you want to be treated! #3 If there is a dispute of who’s the boss is,refer to rule number 1#. And a fyi rule #4 if you cant abide by these SIMPLE RULES, FIRE THEM IMMEDIATELY!!!!!! SIMPLE AS THAT!! Cant fix everyone,not part of your job title,waste of time and money!

  • i dont really experience this because i never stay long enough in any company, at the most 2 years, and i really dont develop any long term relationships with anyone, and for good reason. i always jump job to job because lets face it, a 1% raise is a laughable joke. i can easily give myself a 10-15% raise by changing companies. this has been my method since 1998 when i learned my lesson and stopped being loyal and devoted to any company. i use them and move up the ladder. because at the end of they day, they will throw you away like what happened to me in my job in 1998. never again. many workplaces are toxic, so my method is a way to escape the nonsense. yes, i forfeit tenured accrued vacation, meaning if i stayed with the same company for 20 years, i would have had double the vacation time that i have now, but i would be making half the salary based on my projections. money means everything to me. because it is always there, in sickness and in health, and always makes me happy.

  • Thank you for the Helpful tips. Some people are just unhappy people and as you stated, we can only correct ourselves.., and not take it personally.

  • Don’t forget this important point…bang on the CEO’s wife…to make sure you are covered when your minion job goes away. It’s a great way to step up your game and live the life you have strived for. You’re welcome.

  • Hi Dan! I have a question. What if it’s a family owned business?
    The business I work for is family owned I work in the office with the 2 sisters one of them is the manager. The brother works outside and is a manager of the people that work in the field basically. Their parents are the owners.

    OK so I started working there and it was great but now 6 months in there is alot of problems I am making mistakes some I are on me and some I was taught to do it like that and now I feel like things are getting switched and I’m getting a back lash. The sister that is not the manager was training me but how she handled me after a while she started to have a rude tone. I know I make mistakes and this is my first office job but I never do anything on purpose.

    For example sometimes while on the phone with customers they sometimes tell me exactly what to say and I will say the first part that way but the second I forgot the word they used so I just used a word that meant the same in my eyes just because I forgot the one they used not because I’m picking and choosing what to say. And that’s what this sister says I do(not the manager).
    She gets very irritated with me and uses a mean tone to the point I get flustered when she asks me something or tells me something.

    The other day Idk what I did I thought I was having a pretty good day at work. And this sister was just irritated with me I didn’t know why.

    I heard her phone conversation and the lady she was talking to I had talked to earlier that day so I whispered (they do this to me too maybe I shouldn’t of done it) is that so and so? She ignored me and that’s fine but when she got off the phone she was really irritated that I did that. She asked me basically how I was going to help like that. (this is a shorter nicer way of how she asked)
    I got flustered and didn’t know what to say.
    Later that day I guess the pot had boiled over and she really ripped into me about why she was irritated. And in front of her sister (manager).

    They started having these talks with me and they happen I feel pretty often on the mistakes I make and how they can help to fix them but also other things like my attitude and respect for the sister (not the manager) I started to get fed up with the attitude I was getting from her so I sudly gave it right back… And that got me sent home early.

    When we have these “talks” and they bring these up I change them immediately and I don’t do those things again (attitude wise) the other things like mistakes may take some time to fix.

    I know Im jumping around but there is just so much to explain to see where I am coming from just bare with me haha

    With all the mistakes I make I thought they were all my fault and you know what? Some are I make some mistakes that I even say why in the hell did I do that? But the others like the process of billing or setting someone up for something. There is a process each company follows right? Well I’ve never worked in a office before this job so I do things the way they taught it to me. Why would I change it? And I get corrected all the time for the way I do things and I could of swore that’s how they showed me to do it.

    I know this happens because sometimes one sister will be gone and the other will tell me to do it her way. But when the other sister gets back she says why did you do it this way? Sometimes the sister that showed me (the wrong way I guess) will speak up and say she told me to do it like that. But sometimes it’s from a week or so ago and she doesn’t remember and I don’t remember but I know I never take it upon myself to make a decision without running it by one of them.

    Im just having a hard time with it and don’t know if it’s me or them or all of us. I was friends with the sister (not the manager) for a long time but now with how she treats me I see her at work and I don’t want to see her anywhere else. I actually like and respect the other sister (manager) because even though she may be part of all this she still talks to me in a nice tone and trys to help me.

    If you see this and reply thank you in advance (: if not that’s OK I enjoy your videos �� keep it up.

  • When I worked at a health care facility the front desk women were in a mean girls click, not all of those women…I’m guessing. They would whisper to one another as I left and at one point shouted insults at me as I walked out.

    Then I was being verbally attacked by the “head” nurse and her sidekick who worked closely with the CEO.

    Working at this place was a complete NIGHTMARE! The sad part of this hell hole facility is they provide to the indigenous population.

    I work at a better place now, not a medical facility.There is some gossip and rumor mongers and I feel it’s because they’re passionate about what they do although going about it in toxic way. No place is perfect but this place is so much better.

    Coworkers say I’m quiet and comment they don’t know what I’m thinking. There is no mystery about me. I want to be professional at work. That’s all.

    Side note, the ignorance of nightmare hell hole women, I’m 15 years older, on average, than those sorry excuse for women. I don’t look my age and am fitter than any of them.

    I love being a woman but *amn us women can be so *ucken toxic towards each other.

    Life is too precious and short to live miserably.

  • There’s a common saying “if you are the smartest person in the room, then, you are in the wrong room”; this originally means if one has more potential than his colleague, then, he could learn more within a different social sphere. However, the entrade here is when one works in an unsuitable work circle, he will need to put extra effort to adapt in order to avoid miscommunication; this can be taxing.

  • Linda brings up a lot of good points. However, I can’t help but feel that it’s not that simple. Not everyone is blessed with high octane energy and a go-getter attitude and while some people can become very good at faking that sort of personality, not everyone can. What about people with depression who are just struggling to get through the day? Other people with mental illness? It’s not this simple.

  • Philippines Thailand China Japan they got multi years on this country who the hell you think you are seriously I’m Philippines 5000 years I don’t understand and I will not understand God bless����

  • I am lucky that this is not me any more, but I had a very toxic boss in my first job!!! It gave me a good perspective for future jobs. Great tips on how to deal with a toxic work environment. I wish I had these tips then.

  • My experience in a nutshell: I have been working in a ToxicOffice for 3 years by now. Every day there is absurd amount of trash talk and gossip (it is the worst type of open plan office, small room fully packed with around 20 people, half of which is in love with their own voices). Not only I am not interested in hearing that or even joining endless debates about bs, that also devastated concentration which my quite hard work requires. When I began wearing noise cancelling earplugs in order to be even able to work, they began ignoring and gossiping me, complaining that I am “weird” and other such stuff. It continually grew worse, even though I tried to explain that. It seemed that this was taken as a personal insult by some. What came later: Backstabbing, even more gossiping, work sabotage by not telling work information, refusal to work with me at all, open disdain towards me, gaslighting (when I complained). I got finally fed up with that and leaving the company. I am able to deal with stressing and difficult job, but to additionally cope with extremely toxic and even more stressful environment is too much.

  • I work in a School Photography Company… And Boy… Its Toxic everyone talks about each other, my boss makes it a competition to fight for your position like if i don’t do good as expected they literally cut my hours honestly I’m barely 20 and all that nonsense doesnt affect me but when my boss and other coworkers tells me my actions are retarded and so on “I’m the new guy at the job” it really tests my patience but i just smile laugh it off and continue with resent in my heart lol

  • How do you handle someone who “assertively” tells you do something but their tone feels subtly rude. For example, they will simply say “Jessica, grab that for me.” There is nothing inherently wrong with what they ask for, but their tone could be friendly and they could say “please”. This has been brought to their attention but their defense is, “I speak directly and assertively.” How does one handle this?

  • Keeping inspirational posters, plants, photos of family, etc. in my office helped me feel like supported while I wasn’t by my bully boss.

  • I work in kitchen I’m kitchen assistant and basically there situation at work over the tables one lady was like in my face saying to me it my fault all time all I said it wasn’t me then bringing up faults saying really hurtful thing like it always my fault then boss join in it made so upset I just don’t how not to want upset no more I don’t how to talk or deal with these people

  • How do you deal with a man who sprays aftershave in your face (at work) and says it’s a Natasha repellent? When I called him out on his behavior he said I couldn’t take a joke. I have no words….. speechless…

  • Thanks so much for making these videos. I’ve been feeling so stressed at work because of a shift leader that we have, now I know how to be mindful when she talks AT me instead of with me

  • Hi Cameron. Can you please help me with my problem? I work in the beauty sales industry which is largely female driven. Over the course of the last year, at different organizations, I have dealt with jealous coworkers who try to sabotage me and make me look bad in front of the manager. This happens again and again and the bringing this up with the manager is absolutely pointless because the manager is biased to this senior coworkers stance. I cannot call these coworkers out on it as you mentioned because they will go tell the boss first thing and I will get in more trouble. Its petty politics. As far as kernel of truth is concerned everybody makes mistakes at work but Im talking specifically abour toxic coworkers who are jealous of you and intentionally trying to sabotage you. Any advice on this?

  • I had a job once where I was the only single employee. I worked with a lot of older divorced or bitter people. I was getting promoted fast and purchased my first new car and other things. It caused nothing but jealous coworkers. They were out to get me. If I took a vacation. They would say. Vacation again? Must be nice. My coworkers treated me like I did not deserve it. It eventually got me fired. I was at my job for 7 years. I had an employee of 1 year get me terminated. My company believed him over me. My current job I don’t ever talk about anything I own or have.

  • Hi Cameron, I’d like to ask your advice. I’m a contractor working on a federal government contract. The government worker who is supposed to be showing me how to do my job isn’t. My manager has told her 3 times to show me a particular process in person and on all three occasions my coworker has said that I can just read the SOP. Last week, I sent her yet another email asking her to please demonstrate the process to me as the self-learning methodology wasn’t working. She replied, (and cc’d my office manager and the district’s chief administrator!) that she was able to follow the SOP without any problems, therefore, as a former IT specialist, I should be able to do so as well. Firstly, is she stupid or what? Why would she intentionally draw attention to the fact that she is in flagrant disregard of our manager’s legitimate directions?!?! Secondly, hers was hardly an unbiased, objective test insofar as she’s been performing this process monthly for several years. So I emailed my manager and chief administrator respectfully asking for their guidance as how to proceed.
    I also asked if they could direct me to someone else in the office who was familiar with the procedure. It’s been a week and neither of them has said a word to me. I called my contracting company Friday and am going over to the head office tomorrow to speak with my project manager. My concern is, if this is the level of cooperation and support that I can anticipate receiving in future from the person who is supposed to be demonstrating a relatively “simple” process, what’s going to happen when more complicated processes are involved? So what I am contemplating saying tomorrow to my project manager is that I am a highly experienced, well-educated (5 degrees) results-driven, contributing professional with too much to offer to to be wasting my time in a dysfunctional office environment with ineffective, conflict averse management and a toxic co-worker who seems intent on defying managerial authority and undermining office productivity (as well as my professional reputation). If we can’t resolve this issue amicably and quickly, then I want a transfer to another contract vehicle. If there isn’t an alternative (I work for a small company with only a few contracts), then I’ll take my services someplace where my abilities are appreciated….I do have options. What do you think? Also, what avenues of recourse have I as a federal contractor? Is there an office or someone, like the Inspector General for example, to whom I can complain?

  • I’m working with a person that fabricated horrible things about me I no longer feel comfortable working with this person I honestly fear for my safety after I read the report this person wrote about me I feel like I’m working with a Psychopath

  • “Break away from the crowd and work alone effectively is probably the best idea rather than conflicted dramas” Artistic strategies nail ignorance:(

  • I am very fortunate. I have worked third shift, completely alone, since 2000. My nearest coworker is in the guard shack at the entry to the complex.

  • No games. I just do my work to the best of my ability, let results speak for themselves, and network elsewhere.

    I don’t argue with people. And I certainly don’t need their help anyway.

  • I learn only in the later life to focus on myself throughout my working experience of working with difficult people at work.
    I used to get really stressed out and express my annoyance and irritation working with difficult people. Now I still get annoyed but take a deep breath and tell myself focus on myself. Everyone works differently they don’t have to be what and how I wanted to be. If I don’t like it I will change it myself rather than asking them to change.

  • The problem is when the boss doesn’t really support you. Then the drama is all against you and there is no one to help you at all.

  • I feel as I used to be a more difficult, angry impatient person due to external stresses. It wasn’t fair on my family and work colleagues.
    Thank God I recognised the problem. The important point I took from this is “it’s my heart attack”
    I’m happier, my family are happier and I think I relate to people much better.

  • Thank you for sharing tips that are realistic and relatively feasible to accomplish. Those factors are extremely important. Will be saving this video and referencing them often. I work in healthcare.. that should say it all lol.
    Thank you! ☺️

  • I recently completed an online course that mentions all of this. ‘Keeping yourself right’ as they say in the UK is very important in the workplace and outside of it.

  • What if the backstabbers are the ones who u tell to fix things multiple times and their mistakes affect your work in a great way? and then make u look like ur the backstabber when u bring it to the boss. Which in fact you are their senior anyway

  • Love your advices, they are amazing!! But there are very difficult people as you know that even if you tell Them things in a constructive manners they continue acting even worse,.

  • Snitches… Bosses should pick this u
    More.. snitches never. Carry their own weight.. they are usually lazy but put the blame on other people

  • God i hate workplace snitches. I got one in my crew, and i’m the lead. I’ve called him out but he denies it. I’ve been seriously thinkin bout beating his ass in the parking lot, or following him home. My hands are tied at work. I don’t want to lose my job.

  • F*** co-workers! I just limit my conversation with them and keep my distance. I seen enough from co-workers saying they’re real friends when in fact they’re backstabbers!

  • It’s the reality of work these days.
    No offense to anyone, I’ve found that it starts….in most cases, with the females.
    Or coddled, effeminate men.

  • If a workplace is toxic, often it involves toxic management and managers so it seems futile to talk to anyone at work, and all others co-workers are propaganda hypocrites all too ready to suck up boss’s mss til they drop.
    No one dares to call out toxic signs at my workplace because there is corrupted culture well established, the old workers afraid to lose their job all too ready to kiss ass and play puppets

  • The bringing them to you is a neat lil tip. Does make me wonder what to do if you ask them to come to you and they refuse in one way or another (I can think of a few ppl who might respond with something like ‘I can hear you from here, just say it’ or ‘no, I’m going this way so just say what you need to’)?

  • I really appreciate your videos. They are really helping me soo much. Lifting up our language will definitely change the paradigm.. thank you❤

  • Reality…why? These people don’t want to fix it they want to take advantage to benefit themselves. Either they are going to do the blame game or other bs game that these coworkers do and the boss is in on it too. They select mostly new good hard working employees to be their targets. They get to call out and call these new employees in on their days off. They are going to blame all the work not getting done on them. They are going to write them up if they’re whistleblower. They will manipulate the schedule to have the new employees working closing and the next day an opening. They will change schedules midweek and not tell anyone. They will take vacations around difficult times on purpose as to miss the difficult period. So now we are understaffed on top of having a difficult time. These are just some of the bs these perps do. Sick. These companies should be held responsible for not helping good employees. They all know about it. It’s just that it’s not happening to them, so it doesn’t matter.

  • get them fired first. i’m going through the same things right now and it’s going to be silly cause they cost a lot more than me and i produce results, they do not.

  • This advice only work for ‘normal healthy’ people. Doesn’t work for those mentally unstable people who secretly hate you. When you confront a mentally unstable coward, they will explode.

  • If I want to elaborate; he clearly has become a successful speaker and motivator, I wouldn’t doubt that he is a consultant of some sort who deals with exactly what he preaches about.. Thus he is using his knowledge about this subject to get ahead in his line of work. He doesn’t play the victim whatsoever, he’s the contrary.. A snake in a suit. I really wish people like him understood that there are people far smarter and successful than him without malicious content. I almost feel sorry for him.

  • What I want to know is how to deal with condescending authority at work that may have a different leadership philosophy than you, as well as how to cooperate with different and difficult personalities. For example I have a part time hostess job on the weekend and my boss always talks stern and “boss like” to me and it feels condescending. I’m sure his fixed belief is that bosses need to be scary to get respect or the power he has over me just feels good to him and he likes to have that control over me, or he believes that’s how bosses should be. Whatever it is, it feels demeaning to me. I always think if I were a celebrity or “someone important”, he would not treat me like that. For example let’s say Taylor Swift applies there, he wouldn’t treat her like that and he’d be enthusiastic and excited to have her there. But in his eyes I am nobody important. Me as a person or an employee isn’t valuable to him because of his perception. Or sometimes it’s just another employee that is maybe brash or you find it difficult to cooperate with them or work with them. At the end of the day you have to deal with people for money to live. I need help knowing how to deal with people and maintain my dignity and ways to better cooperate with others and different personalities and people who go to work with different work philosophies and leadership philosophies and mind sets. I don’t want to feel like a weak little girl desperate for money so I’ll suck everyone’s dick.

  • I like your videos. You have great information. I never thought about expecting someone to change their location even if it’s from 1 chair to the next.

    Also, I don’t give out sensitive information to coworkers. How can I be more tactful without having to caution each and every co-worker? For instance, may I ask your age or may I ask what part of town you live in, or what is your ethnicity or is that your natural hair Etc.

    Am I being too sensitive?

  • For years I’ve been in therapy because I have had the fear of my bosses boss finding out something that is really really bad that I did back in 2013. 3 days ago I found out not only do they know but also my boss told them without giving me a heads up. There was no you don’t have to be
    Afraid or scared anymore libby. We are here for you whatever you need we’ll be there for you they’ve had years to tell me. They have had plenty of opportunities to say that the bosses know and they are ok with it. This would have saved me so much time worrying over thinking and having anxiety because of this

  • well said linda, it is all correct politically but not in real life, managers are to be blamed for allowing toxic envo, why we dont think out of box, why we don’t create a measurement for managers like feedback from co-workers against managers and those feedback to go back to hr and then if hr doesn’t do shi, then go to some court crap. todays organisations are made of this structure, upper monkey can shi the lower monkey and stop bull crapping on trying to make people feel on most uncomfortable way to feel, when co and managers are a oles it is time to do a heavy crime by shooting those m f, or just leave, so shoot if you have no famy or leave if you do.

  • I have a guy who i feel like is holding evidence against others in case he gets fired. Its not clear and nobody else has noticed so i have gathered my own defences and evidence juuust in case the day comes. Attention to detail:D

  • I had this toxic work environment, it was pretty severe… in order to deal with it i did couple of things:
    what i was doing is i did work out a lot (almost every day)
    I did all my calls with the customers from outside.
    i was backing up every activity by a mail and i was trying to put managers of higher ranks than my directmanager, but in way where it doesn’t look like i do it intentionally. For examplemanager A is responsible for the hardware and we don’t have experience with it, so i was asking for his opinion in the letters.(coz my manager in order to cover some of the actions he did wrong could blame it on me or other peopleand he did on others, 2 guys got fired while i was there for that kind of reasons)
    It was pretty overwhelming for me and i was talking about it all the time qnd had insomnia and i couldn’t realize the whole negative aspect it had on my life while i was there.
    Eventually i left the company and found another job.
    Once i did that it changed my life. I only then realized how much the stress from work was affecting other aspects of my life.
    So at the end i would recommend to change the work as soon as possible, but meanwhile maybe the tips from my experience will help someone

  • what to do when boss is a backstabber? constantly talking bad about others, puts others down, oh and does yo white women only. she also will stat “you” did xyz wrong then over talks you when you tell her you did what she said to do. constant in her harassment. she will go on for weeks with put downs.

  • The issue for me is outside of work I’ve done quite well at building a network and the mistake was allowing people from my workplace to see my social media.
    They watch everything and ever since then they report back to the manager everytime I do or say something they don’t like. (two in particular) It’s like walking on eggshells.
    I feel positive about myself and my capabilities but this actually seems to pee them off more!

  • I work at McDonald’s and i try to be nice to everyone but tbh i shouldn’t do that and I see biases everywhere and rude ass coworkers and coworkers who are just musty or irritating ��

  • You’re only speaking of one type of scenario. You’re not addressing the case where a colleague actually backstabs you for reasons that have nothing to do with you, but rather their insecurities, personality flaws, etc. Sorry to say that I find this too incomplete to consider it good advice.

  • When is the Boss doing it is called speaking your mind but when someone else does the same thing is called gossiping that makes no sense whatsoever

    I couldnt hold my laughter and ended up vomiting a little I have a werid funny bone

  • Jealousy or being negative are not the only reasons why this happens. Narcissistic co-workers can exist regardless of the 2 things you pointed out though I could see a case for both of those but it’s much more diverse. If someone comes into a work place with the right attitude of learning and trying to be part of a team, there shouldn’t be a pressure to be liked. You can also go through a funk as a person and be negative if you need to, of course without unloading it onto co-workers, but that doesn’t make you the reason why some people are just natural jerks. After working in the office environment for a while you start to notice a pattern of high-school-like attitudesit’s narcissism, plain and simple. Expect this everywhere, it’s just a matter of knowing how to shake it off and still kick ass.

  • Thank you for sharing this, Cameron. Had a supervisor do this today in a group meeting and I called it out. Good to evaluate our personal work approaches too, and I’ve learned it’s wise to not confide with individuals who seek only to blame rather than take positive actions to ameliorate the situation.

    Life’s lessons are blessings in disguise, they make us stronger, more alert and wiser.

  • Okie how about answer to it wise versa.. people who work for long in one company a person comes along and starts doing them same then??

  • I sought out this topic because my wife is having a really rough time at her work. She comes home in tears more and more frequently and I feel frustrated that I can’t help her. She is a dental hygienist with a bit of authority. She isn’t a supervisor but she is allowed to direct dental assistants to do tasks related to their jobs. The continually refuse. She has gone to the department head (a dentist with no experience or training as a supervisor) and he has done nothing to correct the situation. She went over his head to report insubordination yesterday and today he reprimanded her for doing so. He also told the dental assistants in question that it was her who turned them in. Today at work, after the reprimand, they sat in a back room and spoke openly and defiantly about my wife so she could hear them, gloating for their supposed victory. She has told me that they spend much of their days on their phones and she has even caught some of them laying on a table or counter completely asleep. If they choose not to assist a dentist they will do so and my wife has taken up the slack on occasion to assist if they refuse. None of them get any reprimand or due process. The supervisor allows it to happen. My wife works in a reservation clinic. She isn’t Native American but the assistants are. In the past, they have played the race card when someone tries to get them to do their jobs. I wish there was something I could do to help but I don’t work there and I’m afraid if I did do something, it would only make things worse for my wife.

  • I literally cannot do any of the recommended steps. Must be for certain jobs cause most of these tips don’t fit for me. Can’t walk away when i want, can’t control hours, etc. i just have to deal until I’m finished w school

  • 95% of my coworkers are blackholes that suck the life out of you whenever they decide to huddle in a little circle and backstab all the other people around them.. makes me want to transfer good grief

  • “Hey, give sue a chance to address that particular issue before you just bring it to me”

    And the person will go to the following mode: “hum… I shouldn’t have told him that, I shouldn’t trust him. I’ve gotta do something before he spreads that I’m backstabbing people”

    And he goes and starts looking for other allies and starts backstabbing you too.

  • GOOD video! One of the BEST books I have found on the subject is a piece titled The Hatchet Man’s Playbook a LOT of eye-popping, non-obvious stuff! Can’t recommend it highly enough!

  • You are absolutely amazing. I’ve watched your videos for about a month, maybe longer. I had a boss that was seriously lacking in communication skills. I worked in a hearing aid office which was franchised out by the company, so she and her husband owned the business. It was only the two of us managing the entire business. I was up front and she was the hearing instrument specialist. I didn’t know it at the time but she had run through several employees before me that simply couldn’t work with her. She is a gorgeous woman, but has no formal education. I had to retype all of her professional letters to correct grammar, spelling and basic sentence structure. I feel like I did exceptional work for her, having had years of experience in sales, customer service and also have an education. However, she talked to me like I was a complete idiot, rolled her eyes and was absolutely impossible to work with. That being said, we actually got along pretty well. I simply chalked up her inferior way of communicating to her lack of understanding and tried to work around it, do my work and let my performance speak for itself. However, one day I simply came out in all honesty and said to her ” I talk to you like the AMAZING person that you are, but when you speak to me, I feel that you are trying to make me feel like I’m an idiot.” She looked at me for a minute and responded “That’s your problem, and someone did that to you, I have nothing to do with that.” I then repeated myself ” I talk to you like the AMAZING person that you are, but when you talk to me I feel like you want me to feel like I’m a complete idiot.” Again, she brushed it off and refused to acknowledge. So I then answered “That is the way that I feel and if I feel like that here, I won’t want to stay here and work for you.” Suddenly she got it, but she deflected and moved on, and the following week she was so absolutely disrespectful to me that I decided to walk out. I picked my things without giving notice, I simply walked out. I had an offer for another position doing the exact same thing within two days for a company right down the street from my house, making more money and with complete benefits. Someone was looking out for me but for 9 months working for this woman, I tried to use good communication and feedback but she simply could not comprehend her own bad behavior.

  • Have you been in a situation where you had to deal with difficult people at work and had to deal with office drama? What was your process like? Let me know your thoughts in the comments below!

  • Thankyou for the video ������I’m currently experiencing this working in a hair salon.. I’m also quite sensitive and find it hard not to take on others negativity or gossip which doesn’t help things! What are your thoughts on the Law of Attraction? Do you think its true that we often attract these work environments because the universe is trying to teach us something? Or do you think it’s just a part of life and doesn’t reflect on us at all or we shouldn’t take it personally? Would love to hear your thoughts x

  • Thanks to you Jay, I’ve learn a lot today your words are so true. This speech is for someone who have love and who wants to see the better in someone else, to see someone change by saying a good word, i have tried your method and it works. Love, care and respect others really works.

  • I’d like to find a video on how to deal with mentally ill or people with personality defects.

    I also find that doing quality work and being productive often makes you a target of others.

  • YES, YES, YES, Coping mechanisms, please!!! Let’s talk about that walk. Took a walk and was stopped by campus police saying I met the description of a suspect! So much for THE WALK. I journal, pray, listen to inspirational music and videos like this and remain hopeful.

  • I recently found your channel and am digging your videos. For this specific example, aren’t you giving this office bully a script for how to order you around later? I only ask because I find that manipulative people are often looking for more ways to control you, even as you stand up to them. Sigh.

  • Thanks for the tips they are great as always
    I have a situation where I need a report from this particular colleague who always blocks anyone who’s requesting anything from her by saying she’s busy and got other things to do.
    Also the tone she uses is very condescending
    How would you suggest to approach such person?

  • Awesome video. everyone is fighting their own demons, outside of work. There is no need to bring it into the office. I pick up on peoples vibes and i have just completely shut this particular toxic person out. Its true negative brings down negative. And that person stays clear from me too. There is no need for that. We are too busy trying to make money!!!

  • Well in my case the one who’s doing the backstabbing is my boss she talks about everybody in the job on their day off and then when it comes back and being brought to her attention she acts like she doesn’t know what’s going on for the more I don’t believe is gossip if it’s the truth if you have the courage to say something to someone his face then I could equal to say behind your back and I can still understand it I have the courage and the confidence to see what it is I mean and mean what I say this woman at my job is so backwards and all she do is create division and strife between as coworkers we actually all see past her bullshit and we all get along with each other so that is a plus side

  • Great topic and excellent points. Expecting to here more what to deal with the 1st scenario, for example, the coworkers set barriers for your promotion.

  • Good video. Toxic people produce toxicity regardless. Whatever is within someone’s heart will come out through their actions and speech. You cannot control the actions of other people. But you can in return not take it personal or internalize their bad behavior. We are all responsible for our OWN conduct.


  • I agree and disagree with her method…her method is great however imagine your in a team fill with seniority

    In regardless how well you try to perform, senior colleagues can play games with you by push work on to you and then they will indirectly speak to team and offer “helping hand”. They will give you all the work they don’t want to do (especially work that don’t help them gain credit Infront of the management) and doesn’t help you achieve your KPI, when you gather evidence that they are indirectly bully you they can simply say since your newer employees than they are they want you to practice and gain necessary experience, plus because they already voice out in front of management said if people need help they offer helping hand they already again look good Infront of the management.

    In this situation how do you move ahead to achieve your KPI (especially I am involved in team where everyone doing very similar task). Now I could go and have word in private with management, however once the senior know about it, they will be more harsh they will use company process and any slight mistake or if you had task is scheduled to complete in an hour but you were doing your last part almost complete and you miss the deadline (it’s not major issue if your slightly over however because senior dislike you they can then indirectly say your schedule an hour to do this task why are you still working on it). Want to find out how I can deal with my situation

  • Pretend you are in prison, keep the conversations short and do not say anything that can be used against you. The less contact you have with co workers the less issues you will have.

  • Thanks for your video and tips. Could you please, if you have time and interest of the matter, talk about dealing with lazy coworkers and “injustice” in the work environment related with those people
    By injustice I mean the lazy ones can do (or not do) whatever they want and still they receive promotions, raise, or even being bossing around without any punishment. Thank you very much and have a lovely week.

  • The video content & the editing is fabulous. Really like the contrast of the B&W background and the colorization of the video’s main subject.

  • Sometimes you need to punch them to remove those toxic behaviour from them without beating them some are arrogant will still continue misbehaving with you.

  • I experienced toxicity at work, I love my job but not the people I worked with. Been hanging on however I made a decision to quit after I got accepted from another job. Best decision I made! I know a lot of people will say that you don’t have to be friends with your co-workers that you are there to work but if the place is not healthy, too much negativity then it’s not worth it.✨

  • Haha! When someone says something like that to me, I normally just pretend I didn’t hear them. If I cannot do that, I say, “Nah. I’m really busy and in a hurry. Maybe another time?”, and calmly walk away. Most of the time, that sends the message. If someone is too dense to get that, then I simply continue to ignore them. Pretty simple and professional. Hasn’t failed me yet.

  • Coworkers that have given me problems have always been severely overweight. At the time i never thought middle aged men could be so catty.

  • The five indicators of a toxic work environment are really spot on!
    For me the problem was a colleague blaming me for mistakes that she made or accusing me of not doing work that I had done and could be proved without a shadow of doubt,the boss refusing to do anything about it and claiming that no one has ever left that office in such bad terms when I know that the last person working there before me was fired and in the same year another person was either fired or left.

  • I am working in a kinda toxic environment.. There’s only me as a woman engineer. Things kinda stressing me out, when swears has become the everyday talks. In the long term I have found myself to restrain all things, and become more scared to make own decision. Sexism do exist here. I am scared on what awaits me everyday.. My everyday life is so sick in the office.

  • Thanks Linda!! That’s the reason why I left my previous jobs.. these toxic, jealous individuals! I will be more understanding next time.

  • I’ll have few them people I got send home from my job today for no reason I was be lie on and threaten but when I defend myself I’m the one in troubles

  • This doesn’t happen in the real world when you are dealing with narcissists..they are dismissive and hostile so the only thing you can do is not indugle them.

  • Yay I’m already doing these things ♥️ I’ll tell you it makes life easier when you just smile, defend yourself when necessary, keep to yourself and work hard.

  • I have worked in these places myself under performance related jobs run by middle management running it. If you end up in this sinario get out you are doomed to failure and never look back

  • Oh my God, excellent choice of words. This woman is so inspiring. Wish I had these videos years ago but glad I discover them now!! Thank you!!

  • I am having a hard time with a coworker at my workplace. Yes I did throw a pen, cause I was angry but partly cause she called me a five year old, said I was throwing a tantrum. I did call her a bad word, but I didn’t tell my boss that part because that word wasn’t meant to come out, it was supposed to have been in my head.

  • My issue is the one that is doing the backstabbing is the person who I thought was my friend. I believe she is trying to protect her job. Also, she is very close with the manager and upper management. So to call her out would be detrimental to my job. I want to call her out because I don’t have a problem with that, but I think it would make things worse. She is someone who is afraid to get a lay off notice and is obviously doing what she can to protect herself. However, I am actually hurt by this. For example, we have a process we follow for a peer review before we submit an estimate to the estimating team. She and my manager created a ‘new’ process without myself and another co-worker knowing about it. We submitted our estimates for peer review and received a 5 page ‘what you did wrong’ report. I was like…What????? It was sent to my manager before I knew about the new peer review process and then was made to look like an idiot. How can I perform my job per the new process if I wasn’t aware of it? Sounds pretty fishy to me.

  • i constantly shine in my position, I am the expert in my role with many years experience. At the end of the day everyone is replaceable even CEOs. Politics are initiated by selfish, insecure narcissists. No matter how AMAZING I am at my job I always find myself working with sneaky snakes who are protected by upper management and they take advantage of that because no matter what they do, they get away with everything. HR is in place to protect the company not the people. These assholes cultivate such toxic cultures. It’s a shame!

  • I feel like I dont really know how to put the changing my behaviour into practise. The example he gave us, the situation was resolved by a third party. I dont think I really understand how we would even go about that.

  • Great video. Having spent 30 years in these kinds of environments a lot of this resonates. One of the best things I learned (and teach) on this topic is to de-personalise any conflict and refocus on outcomes.

  • Don’t mean to be a pesimist, but I think 90% of workplaces are a toxic breeding ground. HR should have tools for mobbying and collective bullying.

  • These kinds of drama people help you realize that there is life outside your office and you should choose that life without a moment of hesitation else you will be trapped and lose your precious time.

  • In a couple hours I’m going to finally stand up for myself and ask for a transfer to another department away from my current colleagues. The toxicity began when a rumor was spread about me two months ago and has escalated from being made fun of to being texted and harassed for calling off work. I’m so tired but I also haven’t sought any job opportunities just yet so this will be my temp solution. Wish me luck!

  • I prefer to focus on my work and let the backstabbing do its own talking. This way the action is left on the table, not my reaction.

  • I’ve been with the Department of Revenue for a little over a month…I’ve learned that the training style consists of my colleagues talking about what I am “doing wrong” and not showing me the correct training. I’m the last to know, but the only one who needs to know? How inefficient is that?!…I just told two of them yesterday “if I am doing something wrong, come to me and tell me, most likely the training has fallen through the cracks”. The look I got was like I told the one woman to out to the parking lot and kill someone. YEA QUIT TALKING ABOUT ME!

  • A coworker jumped down my throat for asking a question in a meeting. I’d like some advice on how to respond in properly that situation.

    She actually escalated and complained about me. ��

  • How do you deal with co worker whom are good in manipulating and lazy. A person whom pretends to be hardworking when manager and asst mgr are around but lazy when the superior are not around. Trying to Wiggle her way up to management ladder.

  • Omg wow! Thank you so much! I had a Manager that felt like this but I didn’t know this until now! She was so jealous of me and felt threatened by me! She hired me to help her!

  • As an expert in many aspects of my field, I have a lot of impatience with lazy co-workers, who never bring anything to the table, but are always ready to criticize. I saw a great sticker on an SUV here in SE Asia. It said, ‘keep calm, drive on.’ I need to remember this…

  • I feel so stuck! I detest my job. I work with backstabbing bitches & bullies. I was even called out, and insulted at a meeting, in front of the whole department. I only want to be by myself, when I come home. I can’t be around people.

  • You are such a kind hearted person and obviously, incredibly effective. Wish i’d found you years ago, when I still had a fighting chance. Right now tho I just want to kill about 8 billion people. Because too many of them are sadist bullies and almost everybody else will either side with the bully (cos standing up to a bully takes more effort), pretend to be oblivious (same reason) or they really are oblivious. And in the meantime, I’ve been dealing with this for a really long time. I just feel… done.

  • This has been incredibly helpful to me! I listened to it while I was working one day, doing a boring task, and it really did sink in. I took what he said and changed a little bit to be more fitting for myself. I don’t say it’s my heart attack I say it’s your heart attack. So when somebody pulls out in front of me and pisses me off I say nope you’re not going to give me one it’s your heart attack. I just find that it feels more empowering.

    Also from something else I had read if you deeply inhale and exhale six times in 30 seconds it lowers your blood pressure faster than just sitting still. I wrote that on my windshield right where I could see it “6 in 30”. And you know what I used it again today and it totally helped me calm down. Hope that helps and be safe!✌����

  • I’ve been asking for three weeks for equipment that requires no effort to install. And everyone says it’s not my job duty. They keep pushing it off and when I mention it, then I’m complaining or being negative. I can’t win. It feels like they are setting me up to fail. It’s frustrating and I am so over everyone.

  • You’ve just given me a wonderful tip in relating to my coworkers. Reestablish the rules of engagement. I’m looking forward to trying this one out!

  • This female had her dude tell me after clocking out say you said something about sweetheart a couple days ago. Could careless for that female. She knew Eye wasn’t flirting with her but was insinuating that Eye liked to her dude. Remained emotionally calm and stated our point clearly that we aren’t gonna play the telephone game. All while she was right behind the glass working.

  • Great tips for dealing with a toxic work environment Heather! I remember getting the Sunday night blues for the upcoming week at one toxic job. Looking for new opportunities really gave me hope. Great advice!

  • Hi Cameron. I work in a professional environment with “not so professional coworkers”. I’ll cut straight to the chase. Amongst numerous other things I want to focus on this one thing. Cussing at work. I’ve noticed lately that people are coming up to me and having LONG, monotonous conversations with me. At first, I saw it as a employee just trying to get to know me a little better. Fast forward 2 weeks later, I figured out that the employees are trying to get me to use foul language in order to turn me into HR. This may sound crazy and out of left field, but 100% true. What should I do?

  • Move on,, leave it alone, do not waste your time…. in the end you are the one who becomes a massive succes
    In the End, you become the boss at another time in the future& end up mettling them all again are the toxic one is intervewied one day by you
    Has All the Addresses & phone numbers
    Times Up

  • People are more self focused these days and like to act better than people to feel better about themselves. People need to remember it’s not all about them. People are too concerned with themselves and will do what suits them and live by their own terms. People who are humble treat everyone the same and don’t act better than people.

  • My last job I worked with a lot of divorced guys who had a lot of financial problems. I was freshly married and purchased a new car and would go on vacations to Hawaii etc. It caused a lot of problems in the workplace. Nothing but mean people. It got me eventually almost fired before I left. My current job I do not talk about anything I have or tell them what I do on vacation or where I went. Their is nothing you can do.

  • So that’s where I messed up, I involved my boss in the confrontation, when I didn’t need to. I really suck at confrontation and standing up for myself and I am trying to change for the better.

  • A polished and polite talk comes from a person who knows what result it bringsas you brought up, but those rude people don’t understand things easily.
    Usually what happens with me:
    Her: Hey just do it for me
    Me: ‘wise words’
    Her: You dont want to help me?
    ……I wonder how would I end up that conversation from going beyond that

  • So I love this channel. Really. FULL STOP.

    Also, belief that everyone has good intentions, that everyone wants to be honorable or honest does not reflect the experience of many of us.

    My hope: a set of skills which include dealing internally and externally with people who relish hurting others.

  • Half the problem I find are caused by people who I work with who have been hired via linked in profiles. Linked in is an ego driven platform, most on there are self promoting. I have asked the question why is the world struggling with so many brilliant linked in people about.

  • Love love love this video!!

    Love your work, Dan, thank you so much for sharing your communication skills, and your vision for a world of better communicators xxxxxxxx

  • I once had such people but my process was fun for me, because I make it know to the manager I was there for it but was in to do my job and in peace and go home with peace too in my heart.
    And he invited the head of my department and that was the end of the drama.

  • This is very very nice thank you our first initial response when dealing with rude obnoxious coworkers To be angry and even call them nasty names it’s natural human that also means THEY are in control.Now IM IN CONTROL! Now I have some good healthy tools in my toolbox to deal with this person and mostly like you said deal with this person what kind ness and with love because we ALL can elevate.

  • The office manager at the company I work for verbally abused me for seven (7) straight years. She singled me out specifically everyday for eight hours straight. I finally told her to “STFU” and specifically looked her straight in the eye and told her “I’M NOT TAKING ANYMORE SHIT FROM YOU”! I said it outloud in front of other numerous employees. You could have heard a pin drop on our carpeted floors!

    She took what I said to her straight into management and they ended up “demoting her” from being the Office Manager the day that I told her that to her face in front of numerous other employees. She was no longer the Office Manager! Management knew about her abusing me the whole time and did nothing about it, but when I stood up for myself and told her that I WAS NO LONGER GOING TO ALLOW HER TO SPEAK TO ME AND TREAT ME THE WAY SHE HAD BEEN it was only then that Management decided to do something about it. So they took away her ‘Office Manager’ title and they took away that power from her. She could no longer delegate any of her workload over onto me ‘without’ managements consent. She could no longer ‘tell me to do’ someone else’s workload as a favor to them.

    She attempted to ‘be her old self’ a couple of times after that, but when she did, I stood up from my desk and walked over to hers (we were all in the same huge office but spread out at different desks) and I bent down to where my face was at the same level as hers and said, “I’m NOT taking your shit anymore! You got that?!” And then walked back to my desk.

    The consequences didn’t matter to me anymore, the toll that the abuse was taking on me was far more worse than any of the ‘consequences’. From that point forward she left me alone and talked me just as ‘normal as could be’.

    My sweetest revenge (other than her not being able to verbally abuse me anymore) was that she could no longer call herself the “Office Manager”!!! When someone on the phone asked her what her title was, she had to say “Administrative Assistant” and could no longer say “Office Manager”.


  • What about Christian persecution at work? All filthy heathen talk is acceptable, but Christians must stay silent about Truth & Jesus.
    What about threats on my person & attacks on my car? There’s no tip to help with abuse at work.

  • i have a colleague who is constantly rude and bossy to everyone and i know for sure its a power play for her, she knows that she is rude, when i call her out on it, she turns defensive and picks a fight with u. she has gotten worse with time, no matter how much u try to correct her, it doesn’t work, i limit any time i spent with her.

  • What do you do when a co-worker threatens to kill you, follows you home, lies to bosses and sabotages your work, then tries to run you over with his car and continues to threaten to kill you even if you report them to the employer and the police? Glasgow University, Scotland, 2006.

  • So much of my communication at work takes place over instant messenger, between people who work in different offices and may never meet face to face, yet so much of our job relies on teamwork and cohesiveness. Very difficult at times to want to help people when they talk passive aggressively over chat.

  • The sad thing is that If youve been in a toxic work environment for so long you become immune to it and a “positive” work environment is alien territory plus the damage done from this toxic workplace will be irreversable..this will cause serious health and wellbeing issues including snapping at coworkers family members and even verbally abusing and picking physical fights with complete random strangers in the street while going to work or while at the grocery store. Also alot of “positive” workplaces wont hire people from toxic enironments in case they spread the toxicity upon them like a virus

  • Doesn’t address team bullying & mobbing behaviour. Realise subject matter is back stabbing but feel it can be a lot more compkex if looking at group dynamics and jealousy/ envy/ being different etc.
    But agree with points made in this vid.

  • Thank you

    FYI, the women in my office, get upset when I use the word woman or women, they call each other girls, and call us boys. Maybe because this is L.A. Just my insight


  • Love all of these tips. This is such an important topic! Ultimate not adding fuel to the fire will make your life easier until you find that ideal job. Thanks Heather!

  • I really humbly thank you for your video. You made me feel better by really making me really dig deep into the issues and problems with me. So the root of the problem.

  • Thanks for all of the great tips, Dan. In my case, I tried to make a positive difference in my department by talking to my boss about an ongoing problem of workplace violence/discrimination against men and wound up getting punished for it: I got kicked off my own committee for telling a woman to stop hitting people during meetings, my overtime is gone, my boss apparently has stopped emailing me to tell me whether or not I’m getting the overtime (so I have to find out through the grapevine), and he laughs at me during my annual evaluations. I don’t see any possibility of affecting positive changes in my department. My bosses angrily defends violent women saying things such as “violence is open to interpretation” and people hit each other “in locker rooms” so it’s okay in our university office. The toxic environment (violence, discrimination, passive aggressive behavior, word salad, gaslighting, etc.) is taking a toll on me. I just need to focus on improving myself and finding another job. Cheers.

  • How do you deal with a colleague that likes to deal low blows whenever you offer advice. He got in trouble because his productivity does not meet new expectations. Unfortunately I set the bar according to my supervisor.

  • Why wasn’t this video out last 2014 when I really needed it!? Thank you! I really needed to know how to handle people like that. ����������

  • Great advice. Bossy coworker thinks she’s being professional, but is immature/inexperienced. She has no business conscripting coworkers to do her bidding. She’s just making herself look important (she thinks). In reality, she looks arrogant. Too bad Dan won’t say, “I know where you parked!” ��

  • My question: should I give my supervisor (she is over both me and my backstabbing co-worker) a heads’ up as to why I am distancing myself from this co-worker “team mate”? This team mate sits not 6 feet from me (we face each other) and it’s not something I feel like I need to call out to the team mates’ face, but I don’t want her to tell our supervisor she feels like I am ignoring her all of a sudden. It’s because the 6 ft across gal has talked behind my back 3 times now. I am doing my best to just be polite and professional.

  • Thanks Linda great video but being self aware will not change their attitudes, it helps us feeling better. I think ego and power games in the workplace are reasons of jealousy. Personaly I chose not to contribute negativity by accepting them as they are. Bad attitude of others are not responsibility of mine.

  • Learning a lot with you, thank you very much.
    Greetings from a Brazilian subscriber working in Germany, having problems to deal with Polish colleagues ��

  • This old man I work with literally gets so mad when you don’t do things his way. Maybe it’s because I’m only 21??? He’s not even the boss!

  • Promotion is based if boss likes you first of all don’t be fooled been good at your job makes you high possibility of promotions.

    Some bosses are fair promote best person however they are become more rare by the day.

  • It’s a sick and cruel social game among groups and herds to torment innocent people at the workplace…but my strategy is to play it super nice and friendly

    I dare a group of co-workers to try and get me in trouble…I double dog dare them, because I can throw back dates and times and they won’t like hearing it


  • Their a woman name Karen Evan’s that works for fedex simply chain that Recently throw a sledgehammer at a coworker for tell her the bosses want us to do this job. How is it okay for her to be able to throw a Sledgehammer at a co worker. And get away with it true story. She did not get fired for hurting someone he need to go back to work and dont worry about it make a video on why she got away with hurting someone and not get fired



  • Find out where they live. Beat them half tp death rape them in front of their family. Then rape their family in front of them. Problem solved.

  • I remember spending almost 7 years in a toxic workplace with a bunch of old miserable women in there 40s 50s and 60s who had nothing better to do with their lives but talk about me and bring up my past

  • I work in a hospital as a secretary. I got stuck there because it is the only company in New Mexico that pays decently. Your video gives me hope to find something better elsewhere. Thank you so much.

  • Yeah… Try telling your self (lungs limbic system whatever…) to take a deep breath when the lion looks at you as the next item on the menu.
    I think your lower road and many other paths knows the difference

  • The place I work is filled with drama. I hate my work environment. I like the job. The people there are untrustworthy. They will try to make you feel like you’re devalued for your work. No appreciation. Gossiping 24/7. Never have I ever worked in a place so filled with toxicity

  • Well.. not exactly a work place
    It was in the army

    I was a krav maga instructor and i was sepose to train soldiers, the thing is, instead of training them my commander said that they need me to join a spisific squad for a “short” limited time

    The problem was that they thought it was funny after 2 hole month of torcher with that terrible squad full of literally the worst people that the army could recruit to put my in that squad forever that that those monkeys will be my new mate’s
    That the army for you

    After some time i literally couldn’t take it anymore, i wanted to do what i trained to do, to teach krav maga
    And not just guard on a field for the next year and a half
    So… I kinda loaded my gun. and told my commander that this way to much for me
    I was lucky enough not to get in jail for that, but when it comes to firearms its kinda hard not to take you seriously.
    Also my commander knew me for a year and knew i wasn’t like this

    My tip is this, no matter that is your pay or whatever, never stay in a toxic environment
    But also.
    Don’t get crazy like i did. Do something but think of the consequences

  • WoW. This video could not have come at a better time. This has really opened my eyes in light of a situation I’m in at work that I’ve been dealing with just today. Thank you for this! ��

  • I literally live in a zoo of toxicity in the workplace

    Gas lighters
    Gossip Mongers
    Stupid Yoga Pants chicks
    Stupid muscle dude

    Stupid people asking me why I am quiet and boring for the 500th God Damn time!!! Sorry I am just focused on my work…you know? Getting paid…you know?

    Ugh…feels like I can never win or please other people…maybe I should wear Yoga pants to work…maybe more people will like me LOL

  • Sometimes there’s more to it than the story you’re hearing from the gossip or backstabbing. Usually there’s an agenda by the backstabber and boss. That stuff usually comes out later sometime.

  • Can you discuss how to bounce back from a bad work experience? Many times the “toxicity” takes a toll and affects one’s self-esteem, how do you brush it off so that you are not carrying the emotional baggage/fears on to your next role??

  • Im a targeted by mean coworkers who are toxic and insecure. What you told on your channel is so true to me. I gotta change my thoughts. Thank you so very much! I really appreciate you told me this amazing story!

  • Everyone in my pervious job were negative about the company. I left the company. Feel better, positive and happier now. Don’t be around negative, gossiping and back biting people.

  • Hello, I just have a problem with a colleague who is in charge of housing and food in the project, he previously threatened that when he don’t like someone he will do his best to make life difficult for the person. After this should I address to HR?

  • This was helpful. Thank you for posting it!
    The real cause of the nursing shortage is the bullying, but most nursing students don’t figure this out until after they’ve paid their tuition, so it’s a huge source of revenue, and the powers that be are not in a hurry to fix it. Google “nurses eat their young”. The way I survived it for five years, when two out of three new grads leave nursing before the end of their second year on the job due to the bullying; was by working in home care, where you essentially work by yourself. But even then, management can intentionally or unintentionally really “short change” you. And I finally left after 5 years of trying to make it pay for itself, and I still have the debt to prove it.

  • i believed when things starts to be uncomfortable/toxic it might be a sign that you have to move on to that situation.
    Find a new job, cut people out, its not coincidence.

  • I like your advice. There’s a girl at work at who starts arguments with me and claims that I’m arguing with her when I just amiably explaining what I was doing while agreeing with her. She is well liked and gossips about me not doing my work when I work really hard. She pretends to be nice but is extremely aggressive, it’s not like I can’t be aggressive but it’s the work place and that’s something I would never do. I’ve tried talking to her and my managers but no change in behavior. What should I do?

  • My antagonizer as of late is proving herself to be a complete ninny! If only as we aged, we also….matured. Sadly…so far….fat chance!

  • Ive just experience one 2 days ago, straight out of the blue. Metal illnesses is created by these situations, wars fought all around the world, but its the men that do up close and personal that suffer the most.

  • Here’s what I try to do:
    -always stay in control of my emotions (not easy)
    -don’t fall for the click bait when people are trying to manipulate me & just let it pass
    -don’t take toxic behavior personally, because it’s not personal, it’s just attention-seeking
    -don’t discuss politics, religion, war, sex, or my personal life at work (except with those few I get to know & can absolutely trust to keep things professional)
    -put all my serious concerns in email form, in professional language that no supervisor could disagree with, which is sent to the person is causing the problem & to a supervisor
    -never look at work as a social club or dating service
    -keep my presence at ‘social’ gatherings to a minimum by always giving myself plenty to do
    -work very hard & constantly improve, but I don’t brag or show off (not interested)
    -become an expert in difficult technical areas, which makes me valuable

  • My work is so toxic!! I have a breakdown almost every shift. I’ve been looking for another and it feels like I won’t be able to ever find one

  • Surrounding yourself with positive influences is what worked best for me. Once I surrounded myself with people that didn’t gossip and saw the best in others TOTALLY changed my workplace attitude! That and journaling. You are so right on, Heather. Thanks for a great video.

  • I rather work at -30c on a steep roof in the middle of winter than dealing with office employees. Unless i could work without having to talk to anybody.

  • I feel like I was in a hostile work environment before dealing with a co-worker who was hostile towards me and gossiped. Im glad she left but I feel like I didn’t handle it well.

  • There’s a lack of teamwork, especially with this new Generation. They’re all about the individual; selfishness and self centeredness. They will rat you out if it means getting a slight upper hand. You can’t trust this new Generation, they will fall into their own shit snare.

  • You can’t forget that many people are backstabbing only because they don’t like your face or nationality. And others are backstabbing because they are fucking psychopaths and if you fucked up life can get them anything (like bosses attention or can contribute 5% towards getting that 2k pay rise) they will do it.

  • Love your enemies. So nothing has wasted. Fortunately it has a time frame being with toxic people. Good luck to their own family. I have loved you, now its goodbye. I hoped I have touched your life in a way that you wont forget.

  • I do feel all of these. I really need to move on. Here is why I think I need to close this door and move on:

    1) No one cares for one or another
    2) No trust amongst owners to managers to employees or vice versa
    3) Owners amd managers don’t give a shit about the hardworking employees. They also don’t promote,motivate,encourage, nor appreciate us.
    4) Everyone I say everyone gossips about trivial shit that no one cares about.
    5) No accountability for other employee actions.

  • My workplace is full of foreigners and they pick on me on purpose because they don’t understand autism and where they’re from, autism doesn’t mean anything to them when it needs to mean something to them! Even if I feel like tackling them, whipping them with a baton, and shocking them with a taser, none are a good idea, it’ll get me fired and maybe arrested. However, if I spot them anywhere I go outside of work, I’ll call the cops on them and have them arrested and taken to jail which can then get them fired. Trust me, they’re very bad people and I hate them badly!

  • I have to disagree with strategy #1. I have receive Excellent reviews on my work year in and year out. I’ve never been promoted, I have received 1 raise (small and almost not worth mentioning). I have been called stuck up because I don’t engage in the office politics. I make myself too busy to engage, and my boss still ignores me.

  • My manager just sabotaged my sales n i did not ask why to her.

    It seems that money is so sensitive n I was on my probation. Obviously I got no comission. Sometines the easiest way is to ignore n let God give a better job n of course better paid.

    But I can not run forever…at least I hv to fight for me right?

  • I experience this kind of surroundings. I just pray and pray and nothing bad happen to me at my work. Their negative thoughts will not success. Just pray and all things will be better.

  • I think people speak poorly to certain individuals based on dislike, jealousy or revenge etc. but have a wonderful disposition to those they like or are subject to or those who can punish them.
    So telling these people what to say doesn’t have good results because they bully, stir trouble, retaliate, etc. Been there done that
    People at work are weirder and more stubborn now than before.

  • toxic work place is a real thing and we need to shine more light on it to change our sociopathic corporate culture. begin with healing individuals so we don’t continue the cycle of trauma. here’s my experience with toxic workplace:

  • I have survived multiple toxic work environments over the last six years. Its got to the point where i have become custom to the crap where it is almost water off a ducks back.

  • Very true but you forgot to mention it doesn’t matter if you feel good about yourself in general, they will be toxic because simply they have always been this way and probably will remain that way after you.

  • I’m not in a toxic work environment… but I am working with this within a community. I’m involved in at the moment (but not for much longer!).. so this was really cool. It’s not hostile… but it is toxic… What I do, is get clear and know when to remove myself. Which is what I did with this community. And I write… oh… now your talking about journalling… cool.. (stinking up your mind!!!! hahahah.. I love that. I’m going to steal that… is that okay!!!!>????… oh my god… totally.. stink up your mind! ) This was beautfully affirming. I already knew, but it’s nice to hear… thanks heather…another great video! Elizabeth xx

  • Studio apartments and online work and training for everyone..

    No need for homeless people or hunger anywhere in the world.

    Live and let live.

  • Some great tips. Whilst there’s only going to be one end result i.e. leave the job, at least you can speed up the process in a more positive mind-set.

  • I’m watching this video crying. I have a workplace bully who is also the office clown so people keep thinking he’s just being funny but he’s made it clear in 1:1s he’s targetting me. He’s much older than me and seems to be afraid I might replace him even though we have different roles.
    I can’t change jobs yet unless I take a demotion because I’m still relatively new to the role… so i have to stick this out.

    Thank you for posting this. It’s a life saver.

  • Can you make a video on how one should structure their Linkedin experience section for people who have freelance experience (such as one-off jobs e.g.: make me this website, or design a logo for me, etc.). For instance, should each client have their own entry or should it be a catch-all so it’s under 1 experience with bullets to separate each of them?

  • Girls are under 12 years old. I share this every time I hear any time one of my employees refer to a woman as a girl. I correct them privately. It has been eliminated from my workplace.:)

  • Difficult coworkers are called co-irkers. I had one of the worst bosses ever. Micromanagement at its finest. Drove me to depression and anxiety. I had to quit. He said he wanted me out, but didn’t want to give me a package because he disliked me. So I lost a package for 13-years tenure. I should have stayed longer, because he quit the same day I did.

  • Heather. This is great. I LOVED the part about the affirmation. I do that every morning regarding my business and the impact I want to make on this world. It’s especially helpful for people who are in a rough patch!!!

  • Great video, it gave me a bunch of ideas to try! One question though, say upon accepting a new opportunity else where, how do you handle the exit interview with HR?

  • I started a new job last week. one former colleague also moved to this team a few wks earlier. Everything was ok on first 2 days. on day 3 one colleague followed by 2 others out of 5 started ignoring me for no reason whatsoever. they arranged a team lunch in front of me inviting everyone but me. particularly one guy looks very angry when i try to initiate conversation. Professionally they are all junior to me although we are doing the same job. the only thing i can think of is my other colleague told them that I am qualified and they are feeling insecure. This happened on day 2 when i was not in the room as suddenly atmosphere changed when i arrived. Now how do i deal with this? the colleague who until now believed he was senior cannot handle another in the team and is feeling threatened. i am trying to keep a low profile. when i realised that they are being unresponsive towards me, i started to do my own thing and interacting less. this is designed to isolate me. any advice? thanks

  • Heather, I keep hearing music & your voice slightly. At first, I thought it was something from FB as that’s where I first saw the video but now I’m on your channel & hearing the same thing (I’m on YT using my phone). I’ll try when I get home

  • I agree to everything you said here, but with number four I work very closely we sit very close together in the same office with someone who does the personal socializing all day every day from her home life paying bills at work handling her kids and husband stuff to talking and socializing with every single person that comes into the office which is makes my job distracting because I can’t concentrate on what I’m reading or writing so do you think it’s OK to explain in the readers digest version to my manager what’s going on even though I asked on her very first week if I can move and switch seats and he said yes but now they’ve started construction so we’re stuck next to each other for I don’t know how long but my question is is it OK to explain to my manager ‘why’ I want to switch seats he’s never asked. Thank you

  • They hate themselves more than you hate their boorish attitudes? I don’t know, but when at work all I think about is doing my job rather than paying attention to these miserable fools. It’s not a win-win situation.

  • Taking a walk is a great tip sometimes we just need to get away, cool down, and remove the emotional charge we’re experiencing before things get too heated or out of hand. Great topic, Heather! Cheers!