The Parable of Self-Control and just what Works More Effectively


Self-discipline is a MYTH!

Video taken from the channel: Nested Founder



Video taken from the channel: Ian Garcia


The Myth of Self Discipline

Video taken from the channel: Ignite Small Business Academy


Willpower by Roy Baumeister (animated book summary) How to Have More Self Control

Video taken from the channel: Better Than Yesterday



Video taken from the channel: Terry Crews


Why Self-Discipline is so Hard

Video taken from the channel: Freedom in Thought


The Myth of Self-Discipline and the Secret Solution to Self Control ��

Video taken from the channel: Julie Anderson

the science behind the self-control myth When it comes to healthy eating, self-control is all-too-often presented as the ability to say no to generally unhealthy, feel-good foods high in sugar and fat. 1) People who are better at self-control actually enjoy the activities some of us resist — like eating healthy, studying, or exercising. So engaging in these activities isn’t a chore for them. 1) People who are better at self-controlactually enjoy the activities some of us resist— like eating healthy, studying, or exercising. So engaging in these activities isn’t a chore for them. It’s fun. “‘Want-to’ goals are more likely to be obtained than ‘have-to’ goals,” Milyavskaya says.

1) People who are better at self-control actually enjoy the activities some of us resist — like eating healthy, studying, or exercising. So engaging in these activities isn’t a chore for them. Myth 5: Having self-discipline means always maintaining control.

There’s a myth that the more discipline we have in life, the more control we have. This. Like any other kind of thinking, self-control can be taught. Children do better at self-control (and in school) when their parents teach them to solve problems independently and to participate. It seems that Ulysses and kids ability to exert self-control is less connected to a natural ability to be more zen-like in the face of temptations, and more linked to the ability to reconfigure our.

Many people believe they could improve their lives if only they had more of that mysterious thing called willpower. With more self-control we would all eat right, exercise regularly, avoid drugs and alcohol, save for retirement, stop procrastinating, and achieve all sorts of noble goals. The “self-made” myth: Why hard work isn’t enough to reach the top Achieving immense success requires hard work, dedication, perseverance, and — perhaps most importantly — lots of luck.

But oftentimes, luck doesn’t get as much credit as it deserves. Self-control is also the ability to resist short-term temptation and to delay immediate gratification, so that you can accomplish something much more worthy and better in the future. “Short-term pain for a long-term gain,” as the Greats teach us.

List of related literature:

Grubliauskiene and Dewitte (2014) and Duh, Grubliauskiene and Dewitte (2016) also suggest that pre-exposure to temptation can increase self-control, in both adults and children, by preparing them mentally to resist.

“An Introduction to Behavioral Economics” by Nick Wilkinson, Matthias Klaes
from An Introduction to Behavioral Economics
by Nick Wilkinson, Matthias Klaes
Macmillan Education UK, 2017

There’s also good evidence that we can indeed increase our overall willpower by “training” it with regular, small acts of self-control.

“Bigger Leaner Stronger: The Simple Science of Building the Ultimate Male Body” by Michael Matthews
from Bigger Leaner Stronger: The Simple Science of Building the Ultimate Male Body
by Michael Matthews
Waterbury Publishers, Incorporated, 2019

Kelly McGonigal, Ph.D., author of The Willpower Instinct: How Self-Control Works, Why It Matters, and What You Can Do to Get More of It (Avery, 2011), has written extensively on willpower being a limited resource that has to be replenished regularly.

“Goddesses Never Age: The Secret Prescription for Radiance, Vitality, and Well-Being” by Christiane Northrup, M.D.
from Goddesses Never Age: The Secret Prescription for Radiance, Vitality, and Well-Being
by Christiane Northrup, M.D.
Hay House, 2015

Self-control is weakened to the extent that resources devoted to resisting temptation are exhausted, and research suggests that cognitive load is one such source of weakening.

“The Behavioral Foundations of Public Policy” by Eldar Shafir
from The Behavioral Foundations of Public Policy
by Eldar Shafir
Princeton University Press, 2013

Brian M. Galla and Angela Duckworth, “More Than Resisting Temptation: Beneficial Habits Mediate the Relationship Between Self-Control and Positive Life Outcomes,” Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, vol. 109, no.

“Make Your Kid A Money Genius (Even If You're Not): A Parents’ Guide for Kids 3 to 23” by Beth Kobliner
from Make Your Kid A Money Genius (Even If You’re Not): A Parents’ Guide for Kids 3 to 23
by Beth Kobliner
Simon & Schuster, 2017

By contrast, a central idea of counteractive self-control is that the individual spontaneously revaluesthe costs and benefits of resisting temptation.

“Escaping Paternalism: Rationality, Behavioral Economics, and Public Policy” by Mario J. Rizzo, Glen Whitman
from Escaping Paternalism: Rationality, Behavioral Economics, and Public Policy
by Mario J. Rizzo, Glen Whitman
Cambridge University Press, 2019

Although the interaction effects of self-control ability and self-control desire are contrary to selfcontrol theory and Tittle et al.’s hypotheses, Tittle et al. found that the cumulative effects of self-control ability and self-control desire are as predicted.

“Encyclopedia of Criminological Theory” by Francis T. Cullen, Pamela Wilcox
from Encyclopedia of Criminological Theory
by Francis T. Cullen, Pamela Wilcox
SAGE Publications, 2010

That prefrontal executive system, in contrast, “cools the hot,” by suppressing the impulse to grab, and reappraising the temptation itself (it’s also fattening).

“Focus: The Hidden Driver of Excellence” by Daniel Goleman
from Focus: The Hidden Driver of Excellence
by Daniel Goleman
Bloomsbury Publishing, 2013

Thus, the traditional concept of “willpower” does appear to be a useful metaphor, insofar as both self-control and rational choice rely on some kind of power.

“Moral Psychology: Historical and Contemporary Readings” by Thomas Nadelhoffer, Eddy Nahmias, Shaun Nichols
from Moral Psychology: Historical and Contemporary Readings
by Thomas Nadelhoffer, Eddy Nahmias, Shaun Nichols
Wiley, 2010

Daily targets can also help mitigate self-control problems (as many mental accounts do; see Shefrin and Thaler 1992).

“Choices, Values, and Frames” by Daniel Kahneman, Amos Tversky, Russell Sage Foundation, Cambridge University Press
from Choices, Values, and Frames
by Daniel Kahneman, Amos Tversky, et. al.
Cambridge University Press, 2000

Alexia Lewis RD

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and Certified Heath Coach who believes life is better with science, humor, and beautiful, delicious, healthy food.

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  • How many videos you had to post before you actually start seeing results? One more thing I must tell that you have improved beyond leaps and bounds mate…kudos.

  • for everyone who liked the video its an abstract of atomic habits its a really good book who talk about habits i like it, and iw wish if everyone read it

  • Another important thing is that generally instant gratification is more guaranteed than long term rewards, especially in the professional world.

  • Just by way of feedback, the music was a little heavy handed. Ultimately detracted from the video overall. Maybe pull it back a bit.

  • I’ve been wondering recently about the desire to work towards longer-term rewards. This video and modern thought postulates it as either genetic or environmental, but perhaps it’s in some sense cognitive. I find myself often not wanting to do things that are really hard, the difficulty of some tasks is discouraging, things that take months or years to complete and will certainly involve some level of frustration and hopelessness, things that will lead to emotional distress such as rejection or personal conflict. But why is it that I don’t want to do those things and others do? The idea that it’s purely environmental or genetic seems sort of bogus, the truth is some people like to do hard work, some people like to suffer through things knowing it will lead to rewards, they like to get into uncomfortable situations to test out their ability to overcome them. This is what some people (like MJ) would call “work ethic” and while it seems like something out of your control, it seems much more likely to me to be a skill or acquired taste. I’ve been trying recently to develop a taste for doing the hard work in life when faced with even simple tasks I don’t want to do, clean the dishes immediately after cooking, make my bed immediately after waking, get off my phone and begin my next task, I do so with the idea that it’s not about the task itself but learning to want to do the hard tasks in life. At the same time, I’ve been trying to eliminate tasks that give me easy rewards such as playing games and scrolling through memes. It has been really helpful and I find myself motivated to work hard just to imagine that I’m someone who likes to work hard. Everyone has a part of themselves that wants to work hard, that wants to climb up a rock in the most difficult way possible, you just need to feed it.

  • It’s not always about the action of the person or external factors which definitely have huge influence in self-dicipline department. I got to face the difficulty of being discipline, being on-time, and being accountable for the rest of my life no matter how hard I tried. Then I was diagnosed for having inattentive type of ADHD at the age of 27 years old. After knowing the right treatment suits me the most, I start to acknowledge much better way to deal with my challenges and stop beating myself up for being unable of having me accountable as an adult.

  • it’s not, you’re just weak. The people that actually want to go get something go and get it instead of contemplating all day whether they should or not

  • I think it’s hard cause I feel like I’m missing out on what others are doing, but when I’m with those people I’m not missing out on anything. I feel like I’m missing time on myself, such a mind destroying thing

  • He diagnoses the problem effectively, but the solution is inadequate. To take free will away from someone is to take away all hope of effective change.

  • Thank you. Very good video! Self discipline is very essential in life. We always need to monitor our self and need to lead ourself toward a better decision making!

  • Basically, there are things that determine the events that happen to us that we do not know of.. but listening to yourself is key to finding what works for you.. In this post I write about self discipline. Let me know what you think about it

  • love it. but some parts need citations. where is the study or argument that says good diets and sleep give people full battries?

    but the basic message is good. your brain can get tired aftee makeing conscious choices and will after a while start falling back on instinct.

  • So, what’s the best thing that motivates you to create these videos and run ads for them? Will you have some kind of program or video course to sell in the end?

  • If you enjoyed the video, you should read the book itself. It goes more in depth.:)


  • Procrastination is often a strategy of self-sabotage. You have to go deeper in yourself to find the causes of this way of dealing with things. This kind of strategies has a meaning about the way you think of yourself. But it’s so hard though. I’ve been so used to self-sabotage myself, because I’m so used to think that I don’t deserve success, or love, that it feels like it’s a part of me. And I can’t get rid of it. It’s almost comforting, since it’s the way I always “loved” myself.

    But getting rid of those habits asks a real work on a very long relationship you have had with yourself. You clearly need a therapist for that.

  • Hey, great video Ian, good tips on how to be self-disciplined!! NEW SUB for you!
    Keep going your videos are great quality and content is good too!
    Keep it up, as a new YouTuber I too know how difficult it can be.
    My YouTube Channel focus on Motivation | Self-Help | Investing
    Always good to support each other:)
    Cheers Sam

  • 6:00 this is so true. Thanks for addressing ADHD.

    It makes self discipline and long term goals incredibly hard. education in particular.

  • That’s why black communities are seen so negatively their’s no stability so we rely on short gratification such as sex, drugs, and illegal ways to make money because it’s easier in the short term. that’s why it irritates me when some suburban kid says “it’s easy to learn just go to school” or some crap like that when it’s not that black and white.

  • I luv when people accomplish or friends they complete what they wanted to do in their careers…n I feel inspired for those 5min. n mean time I keep staying behind. Hu?

  • Right now I’m eating a packet of crisps at 3:30 am instead of sleeping! Not only am I getting less sleep and will most likely wake up late imma stay fat

  • Your right I totally agree with you!! ���� Thank you so much for posting this your voice is so calming and you made excellent points. Subscribed!

  • People should be taught about discipline and it’s importance since an young age. I always thought this was bullshit, but now i realize it really isn’t. Without discipline, younever get anything done, unless you’re obligated to.

  • Hi sir, I just wanted to know from where do you get such beautiful animations template. Or do you make the animations yourself? Your reply would be helpful and mean a lot. Thanks.

  • You use your willpower to choices,
    the choice is between what you should do and what you want to do
    but if you make a decision what you should do, doing the right thing in that moment then willpower increases after each right choice you made,
    and willpower decreases after wrong choice (Pleasure oriented tasks that is actually not good )

  • It’s ok or at least historically acurate, to have females examples in religions to represent lack of capacity of self-disciplline… But…HEY!.. WHY do you only use girls at each example of this inability? ( except the homeless guy)…!..

  • word, yeah i saw a friend get clean off heroin for some pussy, yet these shit ass rehab facilities just try to use shame and religion. if his life is offering nothing better then why the hell should he settle for less?

  • I don’t agree with this. Lazy is a muscle, just like disciple is a muscle. Using those who fail as a reason discipline is difficult is not a good approach. Also consequences can be positive or negative. Sacrifice isn’t negative, it simply means to allow.

    You’ve ignored the most important piece of discipline. Disciple…It means to be under the disciple of. People who are lazy and don’t follow through are disciples of a lack of self-control. That’s the muscle they are building.

    In my opinion, those who need a motive, inspiration, bla bla…to do what is right, just or necessary, watch out! Chances are they will fail and disappoint you because you have to keep restarting them…motivating them.

    Find a better circle of people and better environment…those who do what is right because it’s right.

  • Q: Why self-discipline is so hard?

    A: 05:44 “Habits mediate the relationship between an individual’s desires and their
    environment. To change the habit, the individuals, the environment, or both have to change, and that’s why self-discipline
    is so hard.”

  • thank you for the video..just found your channel today and I’ve decided to watch 2 videos after every 5 days…..during these 5 days I’ll try to inculcate and experiment with the suggestions given through your videos. I hope I’ll be learning a great deal and will become BETTER THAN YESTERDAY……

  • 7:38 Question: Why dont the rats do the drugs and do litteraly everything else while high? Do the rats realise that the drug harms them or what?

  • Hmm… What did the drug addicts do with the 20 bucks, I wonder. For example did they say, “well with 20 bucks I can buy 2 hits.” It’s perfectly rational and it’s delayed gratification but it’s still in order to do something counterproductive. If that’s the case, you can be self disciplined for bad choices… Which I think people do all the time, actually.

  • For a start self discipline is self love, not the authoritarian kind you speak of. Where you forego instant gratification for long term self respect. Listen to Will Smith on self discipline.
    I don’t think that the solutions that you offer in this video even challenge the mainstream motivation community.
    I think the positive aspects you speak of are covered in most of the motivation videos i speak of I don’t know why you need to make a video with a position of disagreement. It’s negative.
    Listen to speakers like les brown, td James they are that inspiring motivating force that you speak of.
    I personally find it difficult to keep consistently motivated when my ambitions feel to huge sometimes but you have to understand that if you rely on feeling motivated before you act then this is the behaviour of an amateur as described in the video “how to turn pro”.. You must consistently act through discipline and when the motivation returns you ACT HARD.
    Where does the motivation come from?
    Aligning to a vision or a higher purpose, read the infinte game by Simon sinek if you want to shift your mindset from wins and losses to longevity, passion and resilience. Find your vision.
    Work hard.
    Serve others.
    Peace guys xx

  • Is this guy a prophet or something? This channel is a hidden gem.
    I’m in the i.t. field and have been having a very rough time with apadting to a new job feeling overwhelmed and just not good enough to exist since work was one of the few aspects I could point to in my life as successful. Its still a battle day to day but the truth given here sums up 50% of the self help youtube space. Thanks a mill ian!

  • Thank you ��… I so needed this. I’m taking chemistry in college. With this virus going on it’s so difficult but I will continue through and fight for my C+ in this class

  • I learned quickly early in life that no matter what I do I have to be fueled by passion because otherwise it will be a dreadful and painful experience.

    I wanted to make money and I got my first job. I was suppose to clean flights of stairs once a week in two apartment complexes. To say the least I absolutely hated it. All I wanted was money but task was so annoying that money lost their appeal very soon after I started.
    I found that I am taking way too long to complete the task, that it takes me enormous amount of energy just to make myself do the job.
    Than I had realization that I have to find a reason why I’m doing something. A reason that would make me ultimately feel good about myself and give my actions a meaningful purpose.
    I told myself I’m not doing this for money only. Ultimately I’m creating a better, nice place for people who lives here. Also I can exercise my creativity and think of some smarter ways of increasing my efficiency.
    I was able to with ease and even pleasure complete my summer job and get paid. I ended up doing my job much faster and didn’t get as tired and worn out.

    I’m still to this day using the same principle to motivate myself in doing everything I do.

  • I was about to scroll past this because I thought “well, it’s commonsensical enough why self-discipline is hard.” Good thing I always made it a habit to give things a second thought

  • “Your Willpower Is Limited If You Think It Is

    For one, spreading the ego-depletion hypothesis is making people less likely to actually accomplish their goals by inserting the idea in the first place, giving them reason to quit when they could otherwise persist.”

  • Dopamine stimulation makes so much sense for why we tend to choose instant gratification over delayed gratification! It’s so important for us to understand what makes us do the things we do so we can take steps to mitigate our own unwanted behaviors and live full out.

  • V difficult to understand this video.. But 1 thing i wana ask y will power is necessary? People with no willpower are not good or successful? And how you define willpower?

  • If anyone is having difficulties with self-discipline like I am, I would like to talk with you. Please get in touch, I am trying some experiments.

  • Such a great presentation. I am with you. It sounds good, and if it was that easy everyone would do it. Well done!! Subbed for sure.

  • Self-discipline is a technique to create a mental framework. It is not a born-with-trait, but rather a technique that anybody can choose to use, to create a mental framework.

  • Being self disciplined is the best thing ever about 4-5 years ago. I was depressed and then a year later it went into happy on certain days. Right now im happy on almost all 7 days of the week. Because self discipline.

    I have walked a long walk but I am not done yet. I will keep on walking forever and then some more.

  • The only consequence of not having self discipline is to not achieve your goals. Self discipline has nothing to do with punishment. It’s saying to yourself “ that pizza would taste so good right now but if you eat it You will feel like shit I love you too much to let you eat that”

  • Huh. Most of my drug days were when I had the most friends and sexual partners. Now I don’t do drugs, have more toys, but no friends. Smh.

  • I really struggle with motivation even when setting goals. I half to fight with my self just to get out of bed some days. We I have a friend to exercise with that helps a great deal but it never last.

  • I don’t view discipline as punishment, discipline is self-love. It doesn’t have to be harsh or heavy-handed, it’s just making decisions in the short-term that allow you to achieve your long-term goals, by loving yourself enough not to do things you will ultimately regret and that will get you off track. It’s giving yourself the kind of advice that you would give a friend or a loved one that you care about and loving yourself enough to follow it.

  • Thanks so much folks. This is my second time watching, yet it feels like it spoke from my Soul because the evolution of the video mirrored a conversation I finished an hour ago, about when we met almost twenty years ago and we’re both chaotic world hating little boys and are now studying philosophy and pursuing higher states of being.
    Y’all are doing great things, stay blessed!

  • I must admit, I was skeptical at first, but what you said made sense, I have been to many school of thoughts, I don’t want to knock them, but the way you broke it down to it’s simplest form, I thought that was impressive.

  • Very very good video. i agree with you 100 precent on everything you just said thank you kind sir �� for reinforcing the thoughts i was having

  • being a muslim alamdulillah, self discipline is encorporated in maaaaaaaaaaany aspects of my life. I can not describe how happy and pleased i feel alhamdulillah (means thank God) for having so much clarity in my life, answering all the existence questions i have, and most importantly, to have faith built on valid proof, not simply because i was born as a muslim. Islam is a very rationale religion. I do not think anyone who has a mind that is truly and genuinely looking for the truth would doubt this information. I am not saying this because i want to call people for islam simply becasue i would like muslims to be more. not at all. it is not about the numbers. it is because it would be very selfish from me to have found this happiness and satisfaction in my life alhamdulillah and yet not call people and invite them to feel the same way i feel. i am immensely blessed alhamdulillah, and i would love to see everyone else as well finding this path of happiness and satisfaction in their life.

  • Hi Ian,,, I am happy to be your 37th comment. <3.... I wonder if you are bilingual. I did not seek your video it found me. I am seeking exchange of one thing in many languages. Might you be able to help me please <3:)

  • Please read my response, I worked hard on it. Self-discipline is not for the faint of heart, but I believe it can work if people use it properly. I do love your content though and will return. Please do check out my channel.

    If self-discipline does not work for you, your not disciplined enough. Also, when you are trying to reach your goals there will be times you falter. For instance, your trying to lose weight and your running. After a while pain kicks in and you want to stop. This inevitably will over power your motivation. However, with discipline you have to keep going. If the discipline is strong enough, stopping won’t be an option. Also, I noticed a major flaw in your reasoning. People with New Years Resolutions are motivated at the beginning of a year but that motivation dies down. However, you insert that they can’t reach goals because they can’t form a habit. This is not an issue of discipline dying down, the issue is these people lack self-discipline to begin with. Also, you say self-discipline is a paradox. To reach your goals, you need to stop doing the wrong things. This is true if you use self-discipline or motivation. It is crucial to remember that self-discipline is built up and not immediately acquired. Many people are able to go cold turkey and they are able to succeed. Moreover, if you are self-disciplined, you’ll likely understand the consequences of not just doing it. You’ll know if you don’t get out of bed you are wasting time. For people dedicated to making the most out of their time, that is enough to get them out of bed. I think you would agree wasting time is terrifying. You say that soldiers are not disciplined on leave. I believe this is an unfair assertion. Soldiers may be disciplined but that does not mean they are self-disciplined. Also, karate metaphor shows why self-discipline can work too. If your motivation dies because people are beating you you have to rely on discipline to keep going. This argument can go both ways and to assert something would be too great an assumption on human behavior.

  • You may remember me from “How to Stop Being Lazy” and other videos.
    I’ve found hypnosis to be an excellent way to get motivated. If you haven’t heard of hypnosis check it out. I’d tell you but what would happen to “Man’s search for knowledge”?

  • You saved a life today…
    Thank you so much Ian Garcia!
    It most certainly is a myth and now I’m equipped with the tools I need to better myself. I cannot say thank you enough.

  • I think you’re wrong. As a human beings we can’t stay motivated all the time, when we’re motivated enough we have that energy to get things done, thats why most of people start hitting the Gym on the new year and they totally STOP going after few days because the motivation doesn’t last. When we lack self motivation here comes the SELF-DISCIPLINE. We give ORDERS to our selfs in our best interest regardless of how we feel in that moment and we just DO IT. Results will show up after a while and basically it’s exchanging an immediate pleasure or comfort for long last self respect. The Discipline you’re talking about in this video is a SYSTEM designed to control people under certain conditions like (Crime, Rehab etc…) and thats totally wrong explanation of self discipline. All these people on the internet talking about self discipline they show you the results of self discipline, numbers and footage don’t lie. All respect for you.

  • This is where I am now, I used to be so motivated. I worked extremely hard to get good grades for the nursing program and now that I am in the program I don’t study as I’ve used to and I feel like the motivations used to work for me don’t work anymore and nothing seems to be working. With COVID -19 I can’t even go anywhere or library to study. I seriously, don’t know what to do:(

  • My psychologist ask me about my anger management issues…he asked me this…if you had ten bananas and your neighbour took four what would you have?I replied ten bananas……and a dead neighbour!….I’m still a way to go.

  • Comment below with any questions you have for me about life, business, or success. I read EVERY single legit comment from my fans. And I just might make a video answering your question.
    Talk to ya soon! ��