Monday Mindfulness Is how you Listen Inside Your Calm Infographic


Narcissism in a Parent [The Signs You Need to Know]

Video taken from the channel: MedCircle


What a Fan Does to Your Body When You’re Asleep

Video taken from the channel: Brew



Video taken from the channel: Generation Calm


Innovative Teacher Education in the New Normal [SEA-Teacher-TVET Lecture Series] (Thu13Aug 10am)

Video taken from the channel: SEAMEO Secretariat


15-Minute Meditation For Self Love

Video taken from the channel: Goodful


Positive Mindset Garden of the Mind Visualization and Hypnosis Practice / The Mindful Movement

Video taken from the channel: The Mindful Movement


10-Minute Meditation For Sleep

Video taken from the channel: Goodful

For this week’s Monday Mindfulness, we’re going to focus on sound. This mini practice will take you out of your head when you have a lot on your mind or feel overwhelmed, and it’s a great way to build in time for practice throughout your day. Just like the breath, focusing on what you hear is simple to do and immediately accessible. The simple act of listening can become a nice source of stress-relieving calm. Follow the simple road map in the infographic below.

These three mindfulness posters will help your students learn and practice mindful breathing. Posters use the imagery of a flower and a leaf to help students learn deep breathing techniques mixed with guided imagery. These strategies can be a great way to introduce calmness and being in the present.

Here are some mindful listening practices: Wake Up Listening. Early morning is especially good for listening. Try this: As you wake up, instead of turning on the TV, your iPhone, or your computer, be still and just listen. In a rural setting, the sounds may be birds and animals waking up. Whether you are angry or frustrated, happy or cheerful, sad or anxious, when you listen to music, it can transport you to your happy place.

There is just something about those melodious notes that enchant your soul. The fascinating thing about music is that it is a universal language. While the lyrics of a song can be in a language that is foreign to you, the music itself will never seem too.

Many people benefit from practices such as deep breathing, tai chi, yoga or meditation. Soak in a bubble bath, listen to music, or read or listen to a book — whatever helps you relax. Select a technique that works for you and practice it regularly.

Take care of your mind. Reduce stress triggers: Keep your. Mindfulness is the practice of focusing your attention on the moment and, without judgment, observing all aspects of the world around you as well as your thoughts, feelings and 1, 2 reactions. It is also called being aware.2 Though this sounds so simple, it’s actually completely different from the way most of.

If mindfulness meditation appeals to you, going to a class or listening to a meditation tape can be a good way to start. In the meantime, here are two mindfulness exercises you can try on your own. Basic mindfulness meditation.

This exercise teaches basic mindfulness meditation. Sit on a straight-backed chair or cross-legged on the floor. day, especially any time you find yourself getting caught up in your thoughts and feelings. 1. Pause for a moment 2. Look around, and notice five things you can see. 3. Listen carefully, and notice five things you can hear.

4. Notice five things you can feel in contact with your body. (E.g. your watch against your wrist, your. Whether you play an instrument, listen to your music streaming app, or enjoy going to live concerts, music is having an active influence on your brain. Understanding how music and the mind interact, and how to fine-tune your music consumption for maximum impact, can have an effect on the way you feel, think, study and more.

List of related literature:

This exercise in meditation not only calmed me but it also helped me gain several fresh insights.

“What Really Matters: Faith, Hope, Love: 365 Daily Devotions from Our Daily Bread” by Our Daily Bread Ministries, Dave Branon, Bill Crowder, James Banks, Julie Ackerman Link, Xochitl Dixon, John Blase, Kirsten Holmberg, Tim Gustafson
from What Really Matters: Faith, Hope, Love: 365 Daily Devotions from Our Daily Bread
by Our Daily Bread Ministries, Dave Branon, et. al.
Our Daily Bread Publishing, 2019

For example, dispositional mindfulness—measured using the Mindful Awareness Attention Scale (MAAS; Brown & Ryan, 2003)—moderated the relationship between intentions to exercise and selfreported exercise behavior (Chatzisarantis & Hagger, 2007).

“Handbook of Mindfulness in Education: Integrating Theory and Research into Practice” by Kimberly A. Schonert-Reichl, Robert W. Roeser
from Handbook of Mindfulness in Education: Integrating Theory and Research into Practice
by Kimberly A. Schonert-Reichl, Robert W. Roeser
Springer New York, 2016

For guidance in practicing mindfulness at work, see Track 14.)

“Meditation For Dummies” by Stephan Bodian
from Meditation For Dummies
by Stephan Bodian
Wiley, 2016

• Mindfulness exercise (5 minutes) ∎ Observing/wise mind: Breathing in “Wise,” breathing out “Mind” (3 minutes) ∎ Describing observations of the exercise (2 minutes) • Homework review (10 minutes) ∎ Homework 15.4.

“DBT? Skills in Schools: Skills Training for Emotional Problem Solving for Adolescents Dbt Steps-a” by James J. Mazza, Elizabeth T. Dexter-Mazza, Alec L. Miller, Jill H. Rathus, Heather E. Murphy
from DBT? Skills in Schools: Skills Training for Emotional Problem Solving for Adolescents Dbt Steps-a
by James J. Mazza, Elizabeth T. Dexter-Mazza, et. al.
Guilford Publications, 2016

Regarding timing and patterns of change, however, subjects reported significant changes in mindfulness occurring by the second week of the program, where significant decreases in perceived stress were not noted until the fourth week.

“Textbook of Clinical Neuropsychology” by Joel E. Morgan, Joseph H. Ricker
from Textbook of Clinical Neuropsychology
by Joel E. Morgan, Joseph H. Ricker
Taylor & Francis, 2017

In other words, intuitive insights derived from mindfulness is not trying to relax.

“The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions” by Christopher Germer, Sharon Salzberg
from The Mindful Path to Self-Compassion: Freeing Yourself from Destructive Thoughts and Emotions
by Christopher Germer, Sharon Salzberg
Guilford Publications, 2009

And it’s not just helped me: one trial found that thirty days of doing ten to twenty minutes of guided meditation daily increased focus by 14 per cent, and another trial showed that it significantly reduced irritability and stress.

“Eat Yourself Healthy: An easy-to-digest guide to health and happiness from the inside out” by Megan Rossi
from Eat Yourself Healthy: An easy-to-digest guide to health and happiness from the inside out
by Megan Rossi
Penguin Books Limited, 2019

Such a day of mindfulness is crucial.

“The Pocket Thich Nhat Hanh” by Thich Nhat Hanh, Melvin McLeod
from The Pocket Thich Nhat Hanh
by Thich Nhat Hanh, Melvin McLeod
Shambhala, 2012

This mantra is designed to help evoke feelings of calmness, peace, and serenity so you can begin your day from a relaxed state of mind.

“My Pocket Mantras: Powerful Words to Connect, Comfort, and Protect” by Tanaaz Chubb
from My Pocket Mantras: Powerful Words to Connect, Comfort, and Protect
by Tanaaz Chubb
Adams Media, 2018

Listening to these exercises will bring to life the relevant aspect of mindfulness in a more vivid and meaningful way than simply reading about it, so I strongly encourage you to make time to listen to these tracks.

“Living Well with Pain and Illness: The Mindful Way to Free Yourself from Suffering” by Vidyamala Burch
from Living Well with Pain and Illness: The Mindful Way to Free Yourself from Suffering
by Vidyamala Burch
Sounds True, 2010

Alexia Lewis RD

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and Certified Heath Coach who believes life is better with science, humor, and beautiful, delicious, healthy food.

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  • “I want you to forget about any stressful thoughts from your day…DOWNLOAD WAR PUNCHER IV: AWAKENING!!!..and now breathe that anxiety away.” ��

  • Get rid of the ads by dragging the video end and then clip replay. That should help with not.having ads interrupt while trying to sleep at 4am

  • I remember when I moved to Korea 11 years ago…I was told by an elderly woman about this myth. I was told that it chops the O2 molecule in half………shocked to the core that someone believed this, but, still living happily in Korea to this day:)

  • Isn’t evaporation the whole point of perspiration? Still I can’t see it leading to dehydration while asleep, nor is getting a bit low on water going to harm you. The human body is well adapted to such things. On the other hand I’d expect perspiring to be reduced by having a fan on.

  • Are you kidding me? You guys put mid-roll ads in a meditation video?? That’s the stupidest thing you could have done and now I know why it’s barely got views. No one comes back twice.

  • My family is narcissistic. I am literally going insane. I am anxious, depressed, sad, scared, frustrated, resentful, guilty, emotional, broken etc. I am losing my will to live almost. there is no empathy at all. I feel cursed like why always me. Why don’t I deserve a normal loving family. its so unfair. they r slowly trying to destroy me. no mercy whatsoever. its very painful. they made me feel worthless and insignificant. I hate my scary aggressive narc parents. I don’t want to associate with them ever again. they betrayed my trust and caused me to have an existential crisis. I don’t know what is real and reliable anymore. I don’t trust anyone anymore. I thought I knew my parents. they seemed very caring and selfless and loving but now they r the total opposite. they guilt trip me buck of all their sacrifices. its all for their own egos to satisfy themselves and make them feel like an amazing parent so u don’t have the right to ever criticise them bcuz they r perfect and infallible and a slight feedback will possibly cause a rage where u regret even mentioning it. I am just finding out now who my parents r really are. its very shocking, scary, but at the same a relief so I can accept it slowly and find closure and grief the loss of a relationship I thought I had and always wanted to have. I always seeked my parents approval but nothing was ever good enough. I could never be enough for them. I was always a punching bag and scapegoat for their convenience. I feel very drained especially emotionally cuz the emotional abuse is very real and exhausting and stressful and very painful to say the least. I feel so lonely. no one that believes about my family. they r such good actors. its very disturbing. my dad always seemed to have a huge ego but it never occurred to me that he was a narc but he has all the symptoms and my mom has an extreme martyr complex. everything seems to make so much more sense. I just don’t feel safe anymore emotionally and physically. they don’t really respect my boundaries, feelings, emotions, opinions, voice, situation, mental health. they were always pretentious. its frightening I thought I knew them but all off a sudden I feel so estranged from them. no connection. they r super cold and distant or abusive emotionally there is no in between. they show no love or compassion whatsoever its very lonely and painful making me tear up every single time cuz I thought they actually cared about me since they r my parents and r supposed to love me. I feel so betrayed how u could u have kids if u r so selfish how dare u how can u be so cruel! Fuck family I am better off alone! at least I will be able to preserve my sanity and wellbeing. they r trying to destroy my life very subtly

  • I’m doing this guided meditation again and was interrupted yet again by the advertisement. It’s annoying.
    When are you uploading another guided meditation video. Your voice is so calming. Can you do something about the advertisement?

  • I tried doing this and the ad totally messed me up. If you want people to actually meditate why try and monetize these videos? Smh, won’t be watching front here again

  • Reason for the advertisements (I think): YouTube implemented automatic mid video ads and a lot of people haven’t realized it yet but they have to manually opt out of it. I could be wrong but I hear it’s happening to a lot of creators without them realizing it

  • Was it Only me who struggled to take that long breaths… When i exhaled half the air was away already.

    Creator, for next time, dont put ads in these things

  • Be sure to check out the corresponding Mind Like a Garden article here:
    And for more information on scheduling a Hypnotherapy session with Sara, look here:

  • That’s so calming �� I didn’t think this would help me to meditate ��❤️
    You have a lovely relaxing voice ��
    I wish you all the best and for everyone whose listening ��❤️

  • I receive such peaceful and positive feelings from listening to Sarah. I mentioned her on face book today, and I hope a lot of people will do the same. This is such an over whelming time for many people, I know that they would find Sarah’s calm and loving words to be a blessing. I think the least we can do for Sarah, and all people is to pay it forward.

  • Thank you so much and God bless youI really need to hear this I am aware of a lot of things but with me hearing this is exactly how my parents are especially my motherdoing a wonderful job is just doing appreciate you so much you have educated me so much you really helped my life save my life thank you ��������

  • Used to mediate yo this video everyday… today is the last day I will use this video. I dont mind ads but really?!? INBETWEEN the video����‍♀️����‍♀️ Who does that?!

  • Can we have the advertisements removed from this video?

    It really defeats the peaceful music when an ad pops in with loud music and rock drumming

  • Ohhh, this is totally my narcissistic family! I, a “golden child”, was raised by my dad, who is a scapegoat child (with my uncle being a golden child), who was raised be a scapegoat grandma, who was raised by a golden child dad of hers and scapegoat mom. I can track it even further in the past. It is wonderful how this whole bunch of narcissists never divorced and kept this pitiful chain of generations.

  • Why would you let 4 publicity spots on a 15 minutes meditation? I liked it but I will give you a thumb down for interrupting this for 4 times, and all of it be couse of the money!!! ��

  • With an absent father, narcissistic mother and younger sister, my childhood was horrible. There was violence and a heavy dose of emotional abuse. I use to beg my mother and sister to listen to me. I ended up the parent and scapegoat. By age 11 I was completely traumatized and depressed and anxious. After becoming suicidal during middle school, I had my first stint as what started as family therapy. That lasted one session. I have been to a ton a therapy. It has helped immensely in some ways and not at all in others. I enjoy my solitude. My mom passed 2 years ago, and it was a weird relief. My sister feels very guilty. We have developed a closer relationship and I ignore the digs. Healing is a life long process, navigating is not easy but just keep trying.

  • Okay what the heck is up with the ads! One in the beginning and one at the end only please. This totally and completely knocked me right out of my meditation right when I’d get comfortable!

  • I loved this meditation but I hate the ads that keep coming through every 3 mins and disturbing the meditation so I’m afraid I wont be using this again:(

  • I have found that in deeply sexist conservative cultures women prefer to be housewives, don’t work as much and so don’t have as many opportunities to be held accountable by being around other adults. This lets them get away with narcissistic behaviour at home whilst having a respectable persona outside of the house. Indian & Pakistani soap operas often portray this narcissist female domestic character often the matriarch or mother in law.
    In these cultures narcissism fuels power structures in everything from religion, policing, educational attainment to social norms around gender, marriage, employment and what is considered successful.
    It seems to take its toll on women more too. A 90s study in a London hospital in the UK found referrals for self harm for UK born Indian women were 7.8 times higher than for white UK born women! India itself has reported the 4th highest female suicide rate in the world
    These effects may not be just down to a narcissist parent but i think a system that rewards narcissism definitely plays a part.

  • Alright, everyone, about the ads…YouTube has been doing this to other sites as well, without the knowledge or consent of the site itself. It takes some time to get them removed. In the meantime, here’s a way around it: slide the dot forward (like you wanted to skip to a later point in the meditation) all the way to the end. Then hit the replay button. No ads.

  • I think putting the ads in between, Especially during guided meditation is just not how it is supposed to be.. Please look into it..


    Horrible horrible experience

    Why the hell would you allow ads during a relaxing meditation? Would have happily listened daily and subscribed but not with ads in the middle

  • Hello team Goodful, I can see so many people have mentioned about the ads in the middle of the meditation and looks like you’re not doing anything about it. I follow quite a few meditation channels including yours and one of the channels acknowledged the new algorithm of YouTube where ads have been added in the middle of the meditation. They worked on it within hours and got the ads removed so that viewers can have a peaceful meditation experience. Goodful is one of the channels I keep coming back to for meditation. Kindly do something to get the ads removed. It’s a request from your loyal subscriber.

  • I couldn’t do this meditation because of the advertisings, it was really annoying. I would suggest same with donations, I would donate for.sure

  • Ads coming up while you are almost in the midst of feeling better and relaxed. You lose focus and then its usless. I would not try this again. Annoying.

  • What on Earth is up with all the commercials popping up in the middle of this video? This never happened before. So bummed because I was frequently using this video with my clients to help them decompress during this pandemic. Incredibly disappointing.

  • The Lectures on Innovative Teacher Education in the New Normal were very useful for everyone who were able to watch every presentation. School administrators should find time also to review every detailed perspective given by the lecturers and take actions on cascading these to their respective school during the pandemic. Congratulations SEAMEO and looking forward to more lecture series to up-skill and retool the teachers in the South East countries.

  • I always sleep with the fan soooo i don’t care about any myth( 15 years and counting ) 1year ah ah ah 2 years ah ah ah…well you get the picture bla

  • Well back in Spain all I know is that I was left with a terrible sore throat from a ceiling fan in a closed room. In Vegas I was left with a cold and shivering body from having the aircon running all night long at full in a small apartment.

  • Lol I didn’t get why people believe but at the same I understood why they would you know?

    Also I’m personally surprised I have seen any kpoppies so far-
    Me feeling lonely again.

  • Bruh I’m always de
    Fans can cause a slight problem.
    I am always dehydrated and I always use a fan bc I just can’t function being hot. I would have to deal with my hands freezing but that’s only if I’m using them, such as to write. Also fans collect dust really fast and if you are like me and have allergies that sucks

  • i love this video but could you please remove the ads in between the meditation?? its giving me jump scares while i try to meditate along with the video…

  • Fans work by pushing differently temperatures air constantly over you or pulling warm air around you away and only works to an extent that’s why the wind is much colder than it normally would feel

  • Its hard having a narcissistic father died at age 21, i was 2 years old.. im now 22. It was me and my mom up until i was 5years old. She met my step dad and now i have a brother whos now 17.. She cares about nothing but herself. She gives my brother affection and kind comments of course..but she also puts him in things he never wanted to do in the first place i grew up with no affection, doing things she always wanted me to do such as dance classes. She truly sickens me. But i see the narcissistic kicks in me too because i feed off compliments because i never got any.. i even cherish my alone times because i love being alone.. but one day when i get my life figured out, i am leaving them behind. Its a choice i want..

  • False, I sleep with the fan on and in the middle of winter in Wisconsin none the less and I’m still alive. My room reaches a high 40s. While its -2 out

  • Is AC death a thing in South Korea too? I would imagine this being more likely than fan death. Also, I guess keeping hydrated is a must do in dryer regions.

  • Also there’s something to this. Every single time I’ve had a night terror it’s because I’d fallen asleep ontop of the covers with a fan blowing on me. You wake up uncontrollably shaking and really disoriented

  • So you’re going to tell me that a fan at almost max power can harm me when i’m using rn a fan and i have allergies but wake up at 5 am��

  • If I didn’t have some tragedy happen to me that costed me to have to have a fan when I sleep I wouldn’t sleep with fan on all the time I haven’t ever done that because of something that happened or I don’t have a choice after I have a fan so that it can help me breathe

  • I sleep with an active fan for years now and I started to like it even more when I started hearing thunder and rain sounds with it. Then I feel like Iam sitting at an open window while it’s storming outside and it gives me chills and a deep sleep I never had before.
    I love it:)

  • Been sleeping with a fan on year round for 27 years! I’m still here! Fan, forever. Tom Daytona Beach, FL. 10, August 2020. Thanks.

  • Im from winnipeg, and no we arent thermos’s on legs… we are space heaters on legs. I have a friend who only wears shorts, all the time. Even in -50°C. Another friend only wear a 50 year old trench coat that has no insulation. Love it here

  • I have been sleeping with a fan on every day for 3 decades, in every season. I can’t sleep without it, and I don’t even bother turning it off. I drink mostly carbonated beverages because I’m unhealthy. I’m the poster child for dehydration risk. I’ve been completely fine.

  • My whole family beens sleeping with a fan on while they sleep for the last 3 generations I know of. Ive been doing it ever since I can remember. Ive always slept with my door closed. Now cold air does slow the body down like heart rate, and breathing.

  • Have you dealt with a narcissistic parent? Let us know in the comments below we want to hear your story.
    Get more free mental health content HERE:

  • they think I am the problem but they r and bcuz of their abuse I am in therapy. they never take responsibility for their behaviour or faults bcuz they invincible of course. ‘they can’t do anything wrong so how dare I question their sanity’ they r royals and should be put on a pedestal and I am their servant like cinderella

  • OMG these ads have to be stopped. It’s a meditation video!! How can you meditate when your getting interrupt with ads it really kills the relaxation part of meditation. It would of been so amazing without the ads ������������������

  • This explains it, never knew there was a name for it. Just horrible I have a selfish rotten hateful mother. Never enough money never enough anything. And shes abusive and controlling.

  • The saddest thing is we think every parent is like that, and that moment when we realise it’s not, that will hit hard, like questiong your whole life.

  • In the choice between superficial vs toxic and combative, I choose none. If my dad wants to come visit from Florida, he is more than welcome, I will pick him up at the SeaTac airport. Mom is not welcome; Mom is never welcome. Mom is a racist and a narcissist, and I don’t want her around me or my black girlfriend, who has her own mental health issues. If she wants to see her son, she can figure out how to use Google Duo and video call me. If she wants to speak to me, she knows my number until I get around to changing it so she no longer does. I’ve already made clear if she says anything that triggers me, or tries to start the same old bs games, I’m hanging up, and I’m done until tomorrow. She gets one jerkwad moment per 24 hours. If it’s something super important that cannot wait until tomorrow, then I guess don’t make me hang up. If she needed to call me back in the evening, and pisses me off with some abusive nonsense at 8 am, oh well, I’m not answering. If this is some sort of narcissistic power dynamic reversal revenge, I literally do not care. I lived 30 years of my life to her whims and terroristic demands and gaslighting. I am bipolar and autistic, and I, with my fragile and often volatile psychological disposition, do not have the capacity for warfare or games of that sort. Respect me on a human level, or do NOT talk to me, interact with me, zero chances, zero exceptions. Forget “sorry, not sorry.” I’m just plain old not sorry.

  • I have never met narcissistic men. Only women.
    I cannot believe that statistic and I am concerned there may be a feminist/Marxist bias here.

  • My mom gave me a retroactive bill at 28, dating back to when I was 17 for things like haircuts, bus fairs, birthday gifts, xmas gifts, and loan interest my dad paid on CO-signed loans for my education (while getting the tuition and tax credits); just days after graduation, my mom DEMANDED everything returned, PLUS 7% interest. Once that was paid (took me 4 years), they, mom and dad, asked for MORE money. When I said they were paid in full, with interest and MANY gifts, while I still have debts with other loans, all hell broke loose; they denied receiving as much, even denied the bank statements, and their own signatures on the cheques they cashed, causing major fights in the family, and estrangement. They tried to take credit for paying for my school, giving themselves entitlement over my business and income, let alone, discredit all my relationships, to put themselves first in my life. As a result, still holding a grudge 15 years later and now causing another riff between siblings, I’ve been kicked out of the residue of my mom’s estate, just 13 months after my father died. Don’t care! No money was worth having constant never ending battles, barrel chested scream fests, AND, the physical violence. Basically, my mom used my dad as a puppet, and lied about receiving the money, and tried to get my dad to “put me back in place” for more money. My parents were worth over a million, with a lavish government pension, a duplex, two lakefront properties. I declared bankruptcy, lost my business and life, lived on the street, and ate out of garbage bins. No, I did not go to the funerals. Money in family was ALWAYS used to manipulate and control… there was a sickness with it.

  • If only this had been known when I was younger. I was blamed for my mother’s narcissistic abuse and told to try harder. Even by social services and my teachers.

  • I now understand the behavior of my husband we been together for 10 years…he cheated on me with a coworker and left me I was alone with my 2 children 2 months after he comes back telling me he sorry and that he thought the grass was greener on the other side begging for us to give it a try again he made all these promises…after a yr of marriage I started to see the changes again now married 3 yrs in these pass three yrs I’ve chought him many times in his lies found emails between him a another girl also he has ig and he never follow me being his wife but he was quick to take pics with his co workers and put them on ig, Boy he likes the attention ppl give him he’s all about himself….I’ve found out he been cheating. Not to long ago i reached out to one of his co-workers and she told me things I’ve suspected she just confirmed..she told me he acts as if he was single at the job is very flirty and that he will tell people he is separated when that’s not true but now I’m deffinitly leaving him hes not even a good father to my son he dont seem to pay any attention to him. I’ve noticed he only interacts with my son when his family or friends are around ppl would think hes a good father but in reality he dont do much with my son at all my son is 9 now and he sees and asks me why his dad yells at him when he just want to ask a question its hurtful but I know what I have to do because hes not a good role model to my boys he loves himself more than us. It’s been 10 years of stress he has used me lie,cheated, disrespected me but enough is enough I know it’s not me its him.

  • i am so grateful for your channel! I am trying to be a family detective to see who filled what roles and how the heck I got here. I’m a sober alcoholic and figured that was just my only problem and for me to deal with it. I developed ulcerative colitis when I was 15 and now live with a colostomy bag, I am 30 now but started getting surgeries when I was 25. I just got out of a horrific relationship with a narcissist. The truth teller really resonated with me, I never really asked questions growing up but sort of quietly observed that there was some sort of generational tumbling of chaos happening and felt so alone since forever really. The stress from my relationship and especially the absolutely unnecessarily long discard process has left my physical health very shaky. I am very underweight and trying to get it back but still processing how someone could be so calculatedly evil. I sensed it in the beginning and tried to proceed with caution but let them convince me (trauma bond and gaslight me) into thinking that they weren’t manipulating me and was already backed into a corner bc of my physical health and needing to get away from a narcissistic roommate that came out of nowhere and wreaked havoc on my life. looking back through my journals in the beginning i wrote that I was unsure of what was happening and that I was very afraid. 3 years later….Boom here I am. But thankful to have my soul swimming again instead of hiding under a rock somewhere. my brain is boggled though, as from what this covert has told me, which I would never discredit someones abuse/trauma, it sounds like they were the scapegoat and truth teller and i was relieved for them to have gotten out of the hellish environment that they were thrown into. only for them to just be hiding behind the scenes like this?

  • After being abused since birth, I finally figured out that Alphas can be Dominant or Submissive, while Betas are either Fake Doms or subs who top from the bottom.  Now I notice signs almost INSTANTLY regarding whether someone is worth engaging. If I would have had this when I was dating it would have saved me decades of heartache, pain and suffering. (my kindle [email protected] )

  • For y’all complaining about the ads, just a lil tip, if you have chromecast, you can cast the video to your tv and i think you don’t get ads, it worked for me at least, and on spotify you get unlimited skips and get to choose the exact song on spotify, you just cannot skip ads om spotify on cast, much love <3

  • Wow! I am one to feel reluctant to being “superficial” but you make excellent points, this may be life-changing. Have to study up!

  • I have just told my parents about the things I have been bottling up this whole time. I told them that they have hurted me, and it all backfired. They told me what Im feeling is wrong, and everytime I bring up about my feelings, its always gonna be about them. I have been feeling like this my whole life that when they say that, idk what is right or wrong anymore. My life felt like a lie. Idk what is worse, hesitating to tell them about how they make me feel, or not telling them at all and endure the hurts.

  • I hope Dr.Ramani realizes how many fans she has across the globe and how many of us could kill just to make her our therapist:) Her extensive knowledge on narcissism has validated countless souls who have no idea what validation of the self feels like. I hope that knowing this helps her stop over-functioning and be the badass therapist she is whilst also being easy on her self:) Must protect this Doctor at all costs.

  • I’m 45.
    I been on my own since I was 12 till 3 years ago when I was in a wreck that left me in bad shape.
    So I’ve had to live with my dad who is very narccassist abusive (my mom passed in 2010) my dad abandoned us blamed mom so always pittied him, mom was the perfectionist narccassist dad was the I never wanted kids that whore lied to me narccassist.
    It’s hard to deal with and I pray everyday that this settlement is resolved soon because some days It’s everything u have not to kill myself even knowing that it’s not me, and kniwing what im.dealing with still doesn’t make it any easier

  • Just because a narcissist had a traumatic upbringing it doesn’t give them the right to abuse you nor understanding why they do what they do doesn’t negate the fact that their behavior is toxic to you. It is particularly hard when its a parent and even harder when you only have one parent and that parent is using you as an emotional punching bag. They can’t self regulate so they need to discharge their anxiety onto you and they do everything to deflect what feels bad to them onto you so you can carry the burden and fill yourself with self doubt and depression. Its a very unhealthy way to live and you can no longer make excuses for them because of their own supposed bad upbringing as its detrimental to your own soul, your own well being and your own mental health. You cannot heal these people and often they can’t see the problem in themselves because they don’t have the ability to self reflect. Its too painful and they have built up a false persona which they guard like a fierce guard dog. All you can do is look after yourself. Disconnect at the level that feels comfortable for you but don’t subject yourself to this toxicity anymore. You have the right to live a life that is psychologically healthy filled with people that uplift you and don’t bring you down. People that are mentally healthy and whole. You need to be true to your own soul’s purpose and do what makes your heart sing. Narcissists are parasites they will use you for supply and for regulation of their emotions. Its very toxic. If its not a relative run. If its a parent and you find it hard to totally disconnect then keep the contact limited, as civil as possible disengage and cut the contact short if they are getting out of hand, and tell them as little about your life as possible. They are very jealous and you owe them no explanation. Its very very sad to have a narcissistic parent especially a mother but one can’t always change the hand of cards they were dealt with. Its what you do with those cards later which will make all the difference. Namaste.

  • I’m 28 and I need help been struggling with my mother with this since I can remember, it has affected my life and my family and I don’t know what to do. Nobody knows I keep everything to myself and have for long time

  • My dad pressures me to be a doctor, I broke down in tears in front of him due to the pressure. I remember my mom trying to comfort me and hug me but my dad told her to stay away from me… that’s when I realized, I need to cut him from my life. He’s bringing nothing but stress and anxiety to me. I see through my dad so easily, he always act nice to me, gives me nice gifts but all of that is fake. All I see is that he’s trying to win my favor by listening to what he wants. I’m 17 (f) and I want to escape.

  • I don’t know if my parents are narcissistic. I fear that I might be the narcissist. Does anyone have some kind of experience or advice? How do I know if I do the right things? How do I know if I am manipulative? Is it right to come to a conclusion about someone like “You are the narcissist and I will have leave you”? What if it’s me (the narcissist) and because I reject people (of whom I think they are narcissistic) I end up alone?

  • I am not sure, but I think that we were raised by a BPD father and a NPD mother. The clashes between them were a recurring thing in our family, growing up. Of course, I married one of those twice (!) and have been fighting with the fallout/burnout/PTSD since. I love your series! Thank you for sharing this information free of charge for all to learn lifesaving knowledge.

  • I’m not sure whether my parents are narcissists or not, but they’re very problematic. I’ve always thought they were good parents, but looking back at the age of 23, it all seems backwards. I’m gonna do a big reveal…

    I was never taught to wash myself properly and was left with phimosis.
    Whenever I was upset, my mum would neglect me and ring one of her friends and say “my autism was playing up” almost as if I wasn’t capable of any real emotion and it was merely a product of my autism
    she would drag me along to pubs when I was a kid (around 9-10 years old) and I would be surrounded by her weird drunk mates
    my mum also dated someone who would physically abuse me by strangling me, sometimes until I blacked out.
    she dated a literal neo nazi afterwards, despite the fact she comes from Polish heritage where her Dad was involved in a labour camp.
    when I was 14, I tried to kill myself and when I told her what I had tried to do weeks later, she smiled and said “wellll… just don’t do it again I suppose” and walked off.
    last year I was suffering with seizures everyday and as a result I was out of work, and I was channeling my frustration to her as she was always telling me to get a new job despite the fact I was in no condition to work. When I told her how ill I was, she’d say “well I’m ill too and I still get on with it”
    speaking of which, she would always neglect me when I would have seizures, and when she had to pick me up from work after having a seizure (for the 2nd time not even a consistent thing) she had a go at me saying “why don’t you get your Dad to come and pick you up or get an Uber? I’m sick of doing this” saying this when I was in no condition to talk.
    buying loads of junk food and complaining when I don’t eat all of it as “it needs to be used up” causing me to develop a binge eating habit
    I can’t think of anything else right now but I’m sure there’s more on her.

    My dad would often call me a cunt and have violent tantrums punching through doors and shouting at me as a kid (6-10?)
    as I grew into prepubescent teenage years, he’d calm down but he would tell me life was pointless and wasn’t worth living and that the government controls everything we do. Never motivated me to have a career etc
    he would also influence my binge eating habit by bringing me unnecessary amounts of food.

    It’s 3am, so I’m a bit tired and can’t think of anything else. Even if this is lost in the YouTube comment section, I’m glad I’ve gotten it off my chest; I hope I don’t come across as too whiny

  • My mother left when I was 8. She saw me as competition around men by the time I was 12. She never protected me from child abusers and blamed me. I won’t go into more detail to save you time. I always had to save her over the last 40 years, and have spent many thousands of dollars trying to rescue her. She lives in a suite in my house (that I worked hard to pay off the mortgage) and she calls my 20 year old 6 bed 4 bath triplex a ‘dump’ even though I support her financially. She is 86 years old and she has nowhere to go. I do everything to protect her and it’s never enough. I forgave her many years ago for the extreme abuse, but I am always exhausted and depressed. I’ve run a successful business for over 30 years as a single mom and I still get no respect or acknowledgement from her. I didn’t want to label her as a narcissist, but I guess it’s time I do. ��

  • I used to be a Golden child to my Narcissistic father but later on, became a Scapegoat bcs I was able to find a way to get my mom and my sister into that situation. He still hates me for doing that but I didn’t regret doing such actions bcs it felt like we’re living in a nightmare.

  • What a revelation @58 years old, only child, and I have so many evil stories to tell that I don’t even know where to start. She used to tell me as a child I looked so much like my father that she wanted to slap the sh_ out of me. I feel I have sacrificed my entire life. Every dream I had, she thought I was being ridiculous. Her send off to college was to tell me that when I failed not to be embarrassed, I could still come home. Yes, I did go on to get a Bachelors Degree. Her latest attack was over the phone a few weeks ago and I hung up on her. Now, she decided to disown me.

  • Narcissism skyrocks when you lock children up in Romanian orphanages AND in America when you put your kids in daycare all day instead of being a mom.

  • My kids father is a narcissist and has full custody. I’m trying to make my girls see this but they dont understand. It’s hard to prove. And I want to call family services but they may never see his narcissistic side.

  • Could you please do a video on narcissistic personality disorder in adult children, I have 2 adult children I have had to go not contact with and it’s hearbreaking! This is a subject that is rarely discussed!

  • Anytime I want to talk about something or if i need advice(sometimes serious), my mother turns it around and makes it about her, and starts talking about something totally unrelated to what i was even saying. Usually something she wants to get off her chest about work. She will cut me short and will usually have a ‘switch over to me phrase’ (“it’s like when i…blah blah blah”). At this point i have given up even talking to her, what’s the point if its going to be a one way conversation anyway. I never felt/feel heard, my problems get brushed off and i become her therapist, she releases her problems onto me though so she feels better. isn’t a mother supposed to listen to her child if they are having a problem? Advise them?

  • i suggested my narcissistic mother therapy and she said she’s almost 50 so there is no point �� also she told me that her generation was raised on “just deal with it and move on”

  • Can you be both the scapegoat and the golden child? That is where I stand because I can tell that she considers me a threat but also because she’s made me set the standard of a straight A student, plays instruments, art etc, I’m a trophy to her

  • Is there any way that someone knows how to go to a therapist that specifically deals with this topic. I have a mom who has completely ruined relationships around me after realizing she had no more control and I’ve lost all sanity. I’ve been looking for a therapist to help but I think someone is needed who specializes with this.

  • Scapegoat here. Wish Dr Ramani would be my new mom ��. No contact since 2016. Hardest and best choice of my life. It’s insane how quickly I began to thrive and understand how much my alcoholic narcissist mother was inhibiting me. I thought something was wrong with ME until my 30’s. My ENTIRE WORLD changed when I moved and changed my number. I am truly free to be myself now.

  • My life story growing up with a NPD mother is too long to write down. It was hell!! She died last year, she only got worse in how she treated me. Now my older sibling (The golden child) is taking over my moms behavior and is ghosting me, while she has to divide the inheritance.

  • How great it would have been to have Dr. Ramani as a parent… WOW!! My parents were definitely narcissists,and most of my aunts and uncles. I have a huge family and I am an EMPATH, so going to family functions is out of the question.
    Every time I am able to stay away from my family for long periods of time, I do so much better emotionally, but ultimately I run into narcissistic situations everywhere, ( grocery store, bosses, co-workers, friends, etc. ), it seems never ending.
    The good news is that thanks to you both and these video’s I am seeing how to be able to walk through the “flames of hell ” by teaching myself that I am worthy of having BOUNDARIES, and sticking to them, and lowering my expectations when I have to interact with them. I really can see the patterns, they are so predictable, and yet sometimes I still get blindsided. Can I really expect to heal and have healthy relationships,(outside of family of course ) or just better ones??

  • Poor idea putting ads in the middle of a meditation video. For people who want to listen to this peacefully, drag red indicator to the end and let the video finish, now press replay for an ad free experience. Love y’all

  • My formative society was highly narcissistic and racist. My father, mother and both older sisters were/are all narcissistic. This nightmare of origin which I have desperately tried to understand and escape was further blighted by my marriage to a covert narcissist in the country I escaped to and which I now consider to be the heartland of modern narcissism England (America is an unfortunate clone to similar geopolitical ends). My ex-wife became malignant when our relationship broke down because of her manipulative deceit to her own ends when all I had ever wanted and expected from her was the truth. At 60 my life is an absolute ruin because I did not want to live with the discomfort narcissism radiates. I doubt I can recover any sort of meaningful life now and feel more and more certain my suicide is an unavoidable inevitability.

  • My narcissistic mother has moved back in with us and it’s been awful, I’m the scapegoat and I just want to say thank you this was so validating and genuinely helpful. Seeing all the comments and people with similar experiences have also helped, thank you. I’m just so lucky I have my father. I would have been driven to suicide if it wasn’t for him and the rest of my friends and support system. Wish me luck until we can get out again. She’s basically disowned me at this point and is now insisting I’ve made up all my mental disorders because I dedicate my life to torturing her (I haven’t seen her in months).

  • Yes!! my mother all the time! im glad she lives in another country, but i feel for my 2 brothers that live in same city she does. My mother in a nutshell
    1. NEVER wrong
    2. Talks about her past constantly (especially in her past jobs)
    3. Makes up stories/lies
    4. fighting with folks on Facebook in the comments section is her new hobby
    5. gets irritated with noises
    6. hates being told to do something
    7. Can’t take criticism

    I can go on,and on. and on!!!!

  • I’ve concluded that, because my dad didn’t want children, I was off on ‘the wrong foot’ from the beginning especially since I came along uninvited & at a time of serious financial loss on the path to becoming the scapegoat of the family. Stuck with one kid, he eventually decided on having another whom he invited into his world [as contrasted to my having ‘intruded myself’ into his world], and who became very clearly the “Golden Child”. A third child also arrived uninvited & caught some of his rejection & invalidation, but it was my primary role in the family. People even commented on his favoritism of my sister over myself. My brother was the youngest & eventually adopted my dad’s attitude toward me. To me it was just ‘the way things were’, and I survived by essentially a “Scarlet O’hara” mental attitude of “I’ll think about that tomorrow”.

  • the dog knocked out on the floor is killing me lmao, both of my parents are also narcissistic i just came to that conclusion tonight but the dog sleeping is making me feel a little better

  • You are very well spoken and have a lot of knowledge on this subject. I got separated a year ago and the financial mess she left me in I never seen coming. She left me right after my last pension papers were signed, she stole from a bank when she was a teller, no police were involved and her father paid it back right away. She stole from the hospital she works at, one day going to work she walked by wearing perfume, I asked her is it not scent free, she replied she didn’t care. She never had one friend in 36 years, not come over or go out with the girls, she told me at high school her locker was by the door, she was the last one in, and first one out. She is quite always listens never engages in conversation unless it was to tell me what I could do or talk about. Now she is moved out not paying any of the shared debt or mortgage, she does not care what kind of strain this has on me. We soon have tro go to court, do you have any suggestions. [email protected]

  • Im 44, single mother of an amazing kind and “present” 18 year old. I financially support my parents and there are so many signs they have which I must say I never felt as bad before, in fact I think Iv’e blocked most of my child life because I’m trying hard to remember if my parents have always been like this the one thing I do remember is my mother always accused me and father of something (not sure what) but she hated that we could talk whether i was small or now yet she can gossip about things in my life to my father and he must keep it a secret. My father has his own share of narcissistic traits, but I feel so hurt by them both and of recent, my son has made me realise that moving out regardless of the outcome is what I must do to have emotional and mental stability. I just wish someone could help me totally acknowledge that or help me understand what to do if that’s not the way out:-(

  • Please, where can you get help in KS if your children and yourself have been Emotionally, Mentally, even financially abused and exploited. I’ve looked at laws, I’ve been to a domestic violence center to get help. But there are no physical wounds to see, so nothing can be done. I can’t afford a lawyer. The police simply say it’s a civil matter. Advice?

  • Anyone who is on a path to mindfulness and healthy lifestyle, we thank you. In dedication to everyone helping each other out, we dedicate our music to you. Thank you, you are beautiful and you are worthy.

  • I think trust in a relationship is overrated. When my husband started getting frequent night calls, i would ask and he would just wave off those calls as unimportant. At a time i could take no more of his lies, i decided i deserve to know what was going on. A friend of mine referred me to this great ethical hacking team( [email protected] ) who helped clone his cellphone without having to touch the device. My husband was a cheating Narcissist and I’m glad i found out all his secrets and infidelity and how he planned on using this pandemic to get back to me. I got access to his Facebook, iMessage, GPS location, WhatsApp, Call Logs and Text Messages (both deleted and incoming ones) with a remote link to a programmed App on my phone. I’m here in Florida and able to access my husband’s phone even while he was away in Canada cheating on me. Thanks to Cyberhackingsage, now i have enough evidence for my divorce. If you need help or that little bit of closure, i advice you get in touch with them Via Gmail ( [email protected] )Or Text and WhatsApp them on +15713758467…thank me later.

  • I’m not gonna use this meditation if there’s several ads in the middle, I don’t understand what’s the point? It severely disrupts the flow.

  • Middle child here…almost invisible… blamed for everything however. I just hug myself now, nothing I can do about my mom (found my dad, when I 7yo after I came home from school had committed suicide by gunshot), my older and younger sister were the Golden children (straight A’s, in sports and drama, e.t.c) I never tried anything because was told I couldn’t do anything… that I should just grow up and get married. Did that… got divorced, made mistakes etc but I decided to go to college at 45yo and graduated Magna Cum Laude… guess what? That was not enough for my mom…I understand I can’t ever satisfy her. Only 1 of my kids will talk to her and I have 4. She’s hurt but I guess it’s normal now to disown your family if you don’t like them. I still talk to my mom, I understand she’s wrong about me and it’s her issue but I can’t ignore her, she’s 77yo and I’d hate to die alone.

  • look at his body language…so threatening for an american… conversation, simply because 90 % is narcissistic and ready to strike…to devalue, to raise their egos at your expense.

  • My father was a violent, physically and verbally abuse, to my mother,brother and myself. I felt so much shame about myself and “who” I was as person. My mom paid more attention to my brother who was the scape goat, and I learn to just freeze my self to minimize my emotional response to my mom,brother from pushing me out of their (favorite) “special” relationship. I did better in school(though had difficulties learning because of home life) and my mom didn’t want me to do better than my brother who had to repeat 1st grade. My father and mother (for not reporting it)would be in jail by today’s standards. When they divorced I felt the isolated more not being a part of “mom and brother “ club. After I moved away from home I felt so much freedom and independence and healing over time

  • I was the golden child until I grew older and started speaking up for myself. This resulted in my mother threatening to put me in a shelter and then abandoning me at my grandmothers and only seeing me when she had to pick me up and drop me off for my last year of high school. I’ll never forget how when I graduated and went away for college, she dropped me off and left without even wanting to stay and help me get settled in. Our relationship has never been the same.

  • You explained the family dynamics of my family. Except both parents were narcissistic. I was the scapegoat and the disappointing child and my sister the golden child. I’m 44, it still is the same today, except I am now in the process of going no contact. The reaction to no contact is just starting and I hope to be ready to what is to come.

  • When you are about 10 seconds into the video, skip all the way to around 20 seconds before the end of the video and restart the video again. You will avoid the ad this way. Good night everyone, I believe that you will sleep well tonight and that your day will turn out amazing tomorrow ��

  • I think my mom is a covert narcissist, Ive learned from a very young age to be the mom and take care of her because she seemed so fragile and would tell me all about her problems. Then when I was a teenager she met a man who hated me and she would always be on his side and find excuses for him to act lmean with me. She always blames me for everything that happens to her, never take her responsabilities. She was raised in a big family and her mom didnt like her so she spend her entire life trying to get her recognition, I think it had a huge impact on her. My dad is always very protective of me, I am in my 30s and he still wont let me do things on my own, now I just dont tell him but when I was a kid I was scared of EVERYTING. All of this made me someone with very low self esteem, and I am working with a psychologist to help me get better and I am better now but I would still find it helpful if someone could explain to me and put words on my story with my parents and the effects it created..

  • Years ago when I confront my mother “gently” about her having narcissist qualities, things got worse. Not only she didn’t acknowledge anything, but she also got more furious. Years later and nothing has changed. This made me realized that sometimes you just have to let go.

  • Oh wow. I am 25 and my life is falling apart. I was victim of so much child abuse and now realizing it is destroying me. My mom has bpd and my dad istrionic. I always feel i am not enough. I love this therapist, i feel so disappointed with mine in Italy.