Low Self-Esteem Be kind to yourself, nobody is ideal


Steven Hayes | The Art to Achieving Better Self-Esteem The Art of Charm Ep.#729

Video taken from the channel: Art of Charm


Comparing Yourself To Others, Loss of Self, Self-image and Not Feeling Good Enough

Video taken from the channel: Recovery Mum


Help! I don’t like myself because….

Video taken from the channel: Kati Morton


HOW TO STOP HATING YOURSELF (Simple Tips to Improve Self-Esteem)

Video taken from the channel: bignoknow


How to Love Yourself to the Core | Jen Oliver | TEDxWindsor

Video taken from the channel: TEDx Talks


[A] Be Kind To Yourself (self-worth issues)

Video taken from the channel: Rainy Day Audios


SELF LOVE Motivational Video

Video taken from the channel: HESMotivation

Maintaining a healthy and balanced self-esteem is an ongoing process that can help you feel better about yourself, your life, and be confident to try new things and stand up for what you believe. When you have low self-esteem, it can be like looking through negative glasses at your whole world. Low self-esteem can negatively affect virtually every facet of your life, including your relationships, your job and your health. But you can boost your self-esteem by taking cues from types of mental health counseling. Consider these steps, based on cognitive behavioral therapy.

Low self-esteem is characterized by a lack of confidence and feeling badly about oneself. People with low self-esteem often feel unlovable, awkward, or incompetent. According to researchers Morris Rosenberg and Timothy J. Owens, who wrote Low Self-Esteem People: A Collective Portrait, people with low self-esteem tend to be hypersensitive. They have a fragile sense of self that can easily be. Lastly, always be kind to yourself.

Were you surprised by these Low Self Esteem Examples? Check yourself and see if some of these apply to you. Some of us go through our entire life without noticing them. What other Low Self Esteem Examples can you think of? If you know other signs of low self-worth feel free to share it with us and we’ll be.

Low self-esteem can have harmful effects on your mental health, your decisions about your appearance and ultimately, your future. It’s not easy to like every part of the way you look, but getting stuck on negatives can really bring down your self-esteem. Other effects of low self-esteem include: You avoid difficult situations. Each time your brain conjures up a negative thought, put a positive spin on that thought.

Instead of beating yourself up over eating a second donut, resolve to walk for an extra ten minutes after work. Nobody is perfect and you need to realize that. Be kind to yourself.

Seven Golden Rules of Kindness to Improve Self-Esteem. Treat others how you like to be treated. Be kind unconditionally.

Be kind because you want to be kind. Do not expect anything in return and do not use kindness to get what you want. See the good in people, including yourself. Nobody is perfect but everyone has some good qualities. Self-esteem is something everyone suffers from in their life – some more than others.

Yet, few people know how to overcome low self-esteem or make any effort to learn to.Instead, most people tend to believe that every thought their mind tells them is the truth and thus let their negative thinking rule them. It can become increasingly difficult to maintain a perfect version of yourself, which can cause frustrations and feelings of low self-esteem, particularly when your social media image doesn’t match your real life one. Be kind to yourself and remember that not everyone truly. Don’t let low self-esteem steal your shine.

You have the power to be your best self in college and in life as a whole. Follow these tips to beat low self-esteem and develop your confidence. 1. Know Yourself. Too often we spend our lives trying to be someone else.

Everyone has unique talents and preferences.

List of related literature:

When we stop expecting ourselves to be perfect, we’ll discover the beauty in ourselves.

“The Language of Letting Go: A Meditation Book and Journal for Daily Reflections” by Melody Beattie
from The Language of Letting Go: A Meditation Book and Journal for Daily Reflections
by Melody Beattie
Hazelden Publishing, 2003

In fact, if you’re like many people who have low self-esteem, you may feel you must be perfect at everything.

“Self-Esteem For Dummies” by S. Renee Smith, Vivian Harte
from Self-Esteem For Dummies
by S. Renee Smith, Vivian Harte
Wiley, 2015

But what if a part of you doesn’t want to be perfect anymore.”

“Cloning Miranda” by Carol Matas
from Cloning Miranda
by Carol Matas
Fictive Press, 2016

But being aware of your imperfections is humility of the “imperfect” sort.

“The Cloud of Unknowing: A New Translation” by Carmen Acevedo Butcher
from The Cloud of Unknowing: A New Translation
by Carmen Acevedo Butcher
Shambhala, 2009

But what is self-perfection all about?

“The 8 Chapters of the Rambam: ” by Moses Maimonides, Yaakov Feldman
from The 8 Chapters of the Rambam:
by Moses Maimonides, Yaakov Feldman
Targum Press, 2008

Because there is no such thing as perfection, when you can embrace your “imperfection” as an aspect of your unique beauty, you’ll fall in love with yourself right now.

“Pleasurable Weight Loss: The Secrets to Feeling Great, Losing Weight, and Loving Your Life Today” by Jena la Flamme, Mama Gena
from Pleasurable Weight Loss: The Secrets to Feeling Great, Losing Weight, and Loving Your Life Today
by Jena la Flamme, Mama Gena
Sounds True, 2015

You can be perfect in some ways but still accepting of yourself and others as less than perfect in other ways.

“Children of the Self-Absorbed: A Grown-Up's Guide to Getting Over Narcissistic Parents” by Nina W Brown
from Children of the Self-Absorbed: A Grown-Up’s Guide to Getting Over Narcissistic Parents
by Nina W Brown
New Harbinger Publications, 2008

I don’t want to be perfect.

“Confessions of a Public Speaker” by Scott Berkun
from Confessions of a Public Speaker
by Scott Berkun
O’Reilly Media, 2009

There is no such thing as imperfection.

“The Heart of the Soul: Emotional Awareness” by Gary Zukav, Linda Francis
from The Heart of the Soul: Emotional Awareness
by Gary Zukav, Linda Francis
Free Press, 2007

We all know that there’s no such thing as being perfect — we all have flaws, we all make mistakes, and there’s always room for improvement.

“The Reality Slap: How to Find Fulfilment When Life Hurts” by Russ Harris
from The Reality Slap: How to Find Fulfilment When Life Hurts
by Russ Harris
Exisle Publishing Pty Limited, 2011

Alexia Lewis RD

Registered Dietitian Nutritionist and Certified Heath Coach who believes life is better with science, humor, and beautiful, delicious, healthy food.

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  • Sometimes I feel like God is trying to guide me through my YouTube suggestions


  • Thank you so much. Your channel has help me through my almost second year with several mental disordes which includes generalized anxiety, major depression and eating disorder non specific and some emotional trama and extreme low confidence and self esteem. I wish more channels were focus on mental health and how to become a better you, I hope you have a great day,

  • I cried,I’m not loving myself after watching this they cant make you insecure only you can believe it so stay strong love yourself for who you are don’t let anyone change you!!

  • I got the worst of these habits as i entered college. And what you said here really echoes these realizations and reinforces these positive habits. One thing I do is go to music to help me out me negative feedback loops. And speaking of, whats the name of the song you use in your intro?

    Edit: sorry for some reason the full text didnt post.

  • I’m thirteen and I made mistakes but learned from them and some of my family members don’t like me because of that I used to tell myself it’s my fault and I would say hurtful words for myself because they didn’t like me. I said sorry to one of them and they lied they said they forgive me but they would talk bad about me.but I am here and I don’t need anyone to love me but myself ❤️

  • You’re amazing. I need a video on therapy for the counselor. What do you do when you’re counselor doesn’t want to live. Also am looking for a video to help foster kids that never had real parents or anyone really in their lives. Suggests are welcome.

  • Aww you’re lovely sherhina as you are your a lovely sweet lady and very pretty I love watching you as I do value your videos they really help me as I’ve been there wanting me to be different as well but you’ve helped me and enabling my family now and friends where I’m coming from but tomorrow I’m going into the brain hospital to see how my brains going on as I have a serious illness with my brain well not life threatening but serious in itself.
    Thanks sherhina you take care and I’ll love watching you again as you are a lovely kind lady.X

  • I came here to say thank you to person speaking, to the person that posted this and the person that edited this..this video changed my life.i used to watch it like 2 years ago almost everyday when I was being emotionally bullied by my classmates…I started walking into class keep quiet and open my books and cut all the fake friends and I’m more happy now..so I just came to say thank you

  • This is my first exposure to ACT and Hayes. Thank you for the introduction!
    I’m glad he redefines values. I can see getting stuck there.
    The ‘clown suit in my head’ creates a massive guilt trip with Values and Goal Setting: “If you valued _ you would _ Since you never _ your values must not mean that much. Or if you do Value _ and don’t _, then you must be hopelessly: lazy, selfish, hopeless, undisciplined, etc.

  • I guess my problem is that it isn’t anybody else’s fault I hate myself I just hate myself like they didn’t do anything I just hate myself

  • Is Rotogenflux Methods effective to improve your IQ in a short period of time? We have read a lot of good stuff about this iq boost secrets.

  • Man. I started crying when he talked about family tearing u down. Like my mum always tears me down then when she sees how upset I am she then says nice things. It’s fake. I know it. She knows it. And she gets super upset saying she tries her best about something when no one is saying bad about it. It’s in her head and her negative mind set is making me have a negative one.

    I needed this video to recognise this. So THANK YOU

  • I can relate to that. But I really have health issues that I wanna get rid of. I have acne, keratosis pilaris, demaged hair, I gained weight. So I really have to do something. But I don’t know how I would feel if my body looks fine again.

  • Thank you����������.im learning how to love myself. I’m learning not to compare myself to others and treating myself badly anymore. I’m learning to avoid negativity and spread positivity. Listening to this will help, thanks so much. Keep going forward, you’re amazing

  • I hate my body, I always have, but this makes me love myself. For anyone reading this and seeing yourself, your wonderful. Love yourself take care of yourself you will never be perfect, but you can try to be better every morning

  • Note: I’m not a strongly religious person but I accept there could be something God like. I was raised catholic, saying oh lord is just a habit, honestly.
    You can write you own little pledge but here is mine:
    I’m not worthless.
    I’m scared of my differences.
    I’m shy.
    I can be rude and messy.
    I can be lazy and dumb.
    I’m not the most lovable person, but I’m still deserving of love and friendship.
    Please Lord forgive me for being so weak and easily manipulated, and for having no self confidence.

    Please Lord help me in extreme cases of self doubt, fear, low self esteem, and distrust because it can paralyze me.

  • This is so important. I love your videos! Watching your videos has become a part of my self care routine. What a gift! Thank you SO much!��

  • “People who literally dislike you…… without no trace they don’t f with you” You gotta respect yourself enough to continue on the path of life without company������

  • God got rid of all the abusive, mean, cruel, petty, and toxic people out of my life and I feel so much better. I’m feel great without them. No more psychic vampires.

  • Sticks and stones may break my bones but words never cause physical pain..instead..they do so much more damage than you can ever imagine…a person’s opinion about your value is zero..because your value..is 100%..nothing more or less..God made you perfect..

    *The happiest people..are the most hurt..
    The prettiest eyes..have shed the most tears..
    The most Outgoing person..has have gone through the most challenges..and lost..
    The most beautiful..has the most amount of insecurities*

  • As always, thank you for your helpfull video’s, dear Kati.:* I am kind of nervous to ask, but I am going to ask anyway.

    I was wondering if the feelings I have and the way I act during these cases are because of social anxiety or perhaps something else, cause before I taught it was just my personality but as I am growing older I am starting to feel the struggle in life with these feelings and bounderees because as we grow we have to become responsible and do stuff on our own and a lot of new things are being introduced in our lives.

    And so the last years it has been bothering me more then ever and I started to think about the moment when I was in 7th grade when my class teachers wanted me to go to the school counseler so badly because I did real good at school except for public speaking, that was on the other hand a disaster. And so they tought that it must be some kind of social phobia. I never went tho, because my parents didn’t believe in counselers, therapy and psychologists and mental issues in general. They must have taught that it will eventually grow away as I grow older but it is only growing bigger as I grow older.:'(

    The struggles I have on a day to day basis are the following:
    From being very young I didn’t have the balls to go interact with the other kids in my class and so it was until 3d grade that I had my first real friend. Everytime I am new somewhere I don’t make the first steps and so it could take me a while to make friends. One year I spent most of the time during the periods in the hallways.
    At the uni it was the same. At my studentjob it was also the same.
    I used to rehears public speaking for weeks in advance and still I used to skip it at the end. The last years I have been giving the presentation, but sometimes I feel my classmates are laughing at me or the things I am saying are stupid or nobody cares about the things I am sharing and so I stop in the middle of the presentation and randomly go site on my chair. That makes me even more nervous because I didn’t do the full presentation and so people are going to wonder and think I am weird or whatever.
    I do not order food and do not eat in public. I do not order food because people are going to judge what I bought and think it is stupid. I do not eat in public because I feel like I look weird while eating. Little background story: there was this good friend of mine and he used to tell me (we were 12 years old back then) that I look like a goat while eating and so I didn’t like eating in public anymore because people were going to judge me based off of that. I now even avoid eating in front of my parents and sister. But the problem is now that because I don’t eat in front of people keeping in mind I am naturaly very skinny everyone thinks I have an eating disorder. College’s, classmates, parents,… So I have to fors myself eating in front of some people to proove them that I ain’t anorexic, with all the respect to anorexic people obvisiouly.
    I do not go to party’s and events I am invited to. I always say that I am going to go and at the very last minute I make an excuse so that I don’t have to go. I actually don’t like this cause I don’t like lying like this. The problem with the parties is tho that I feel like I genuinly can’t breath in such crowded places. And because there are so many people that possibly can be judging me, I feel that I can’t controle the situation anymore. I also feel like when people are laughing, they are laughing about me. I also lack some social skills cause sometimes I don’t even know how to act in specific situations which will make me even look more weird. I even didn’t go to my 2 own graduating party’s and acted like I was sick or something like that.
    I don’t like having the attention on me. I remember in 3d grade one time I wasn’t allowed to go swimming because I was sick and so at my school we then have to go to another class while our class is having the swimming lesson and so they told me to go to the 6th grade. So I went there but didn’t have the guts to knock on the door so I stayed a while in the corridor and eventually went to the toilet because otherwise teachers were going to ask me what I was doing on my own in the coridor. Recently I was 10 minutes late for a lecture at my university and so I waited 50 whole minutes until the break came and I could enter without standing out in front of everyone.
    -I do not like speaking about myself, especially my feelings, cause I find this quite embarrassing. I am shitting my pants typing this down. I always was quite when we had like class conversations. Also one time a classmate asked what music I listen to and I was kind of brushing the question of because what if my music was childish or for old people or whatever? I feel real embareced crying in front people, so I just run away when I feel like I have to cry, but luckily I don’t cry that much.
    While sitting with my friends I feel like I am bothering them. I feel like I am waisting their time. I feel guilty being with them. Let alone start talking about myself while I am with them.
    I do not like shopping, cause I think that people are going to think I bought stupid stuff and I just get drained being in such crowded places for so long. And if I get in and don’t find what I wanted, I have to take something else because otherwise I think that they might think I stole something. One time I remember I bought something and the security alarm was going but nobody came so I just left the shop and the rest of the day I just taught that they knew me, they would follow me and soon will find me and put me in jail. I couldn’t sleep that night and felt so bad for something I didn’t even do. So the next day and again went to the shop and explained the situation and they said it was fine and that it was probably my computer and I just needed that affirmation to go on with my life cause that night was a nightmare. Also I feel like I am being to slow when I have to pay.
    Before going outside the house I rehears what I am going to say and go over a few scenario’s for example if an old lady asked me where… was, or if someone asked me the way how I would respond. One time someone asked me where th tram stops when we were in the tram and so I responded but boy boy boy… I was stuttering although I think my English is quite good and I was sweating, I had a dry mouth, I felt faint and nauseous. I was sweating so badly eventhough I took a shower that morning. Or how I am going to greet my friends although I try to just smile and that is all. I have that problem now at work where I genuinly want to say ‘Hi, ma’am or sir, welcome to our shop’ but thet words just won’t come out of my mouth, like I swear they are in my mind and everything but there is something holding me back from speaking those words. Or when I wan’t to ask a question in the aula, I just end up letting my friend ask it.
    Sitting in class makes me nervous so I would tap my foot and classmates would make comments which made me even more nervous.
    I hate taking appointments for myself. Or calling on the phone. When people call me I don’t respond unless it is my father.
    If I call I rehears and write down what I want to say before actually calling.
    When I am in the tram and people are laughing I feel they laugh about me.
    I don’t like singing in front of others. I one time got an F for not even attempting it.
    I hate eyecontact cause I feel that poeple are going to notice me going red and it is just too embarrassing to hold eyecontact for that long. I sometimes don’t make eyecontact with my parents.
    I do not like showing my own paintings and drawings cause I feel like people are going to have judgments about them.
    I always have this thing where I say really stupid stuff while being in the moment itself and later while I am analysing the situation I find better ways of putting the feelings I felt into words.Then I wish I woudl have said them like so. What I hate the most is I rehears that much and end up messing it up like today with my job interview. But anyway.
    I also apoligize afterwards for stuff I do cause I feel like I bothered the person by doing a cutain something.
    I have this problem were I can’t diffirantiate anymore between if people are truly laughing about me and judging me or not.
    I don’t like wearing colors that stick out cause I don’t like sticking out. I also am trying to wear appropriate clothes cause sometimes I feel people are seeing that I am wearing something to thick or thin for the weather.
    In the shop where I workcause I tought if I start to work there I will concurre some of my fears but it is so stressfull manI have to pack in stuff for gifts and I feel that I have to do that as fast as I can otherwise I am pissing the client off and I will be packing in and apologising at the same time for taking so long to pack in.
    I read a mail 1000 times before sending it.
    I always wear a ring to play with it while I am talking.
    -When I go to the restroom I feel like the other girls are going to hear me pee and judge the amount of pee I pee so I already flush the toilet and pee at the same time so that the others in the public restroom can’t hear.
    One time the bussdriver forgot to stop at my busstop and normaly people shout at him so that he can hear and stop but I just waited for the next busstop and got of the bus and walked all the way back.
    Sometimes I vomit in the morning when I am nervous for the day that will begin.

    Anyway, I could go on but these are the most repeatable situations I have. This whole thing is just time consuming, draining and exhausting. Does someone know what it is? Cause I think it is time to act upon it. Still nervous typing this. -_
    I also see now that I wrote a whole book, so excuse that. But I just wanted to get my feelings and experiences as good as possible across. Also, excuse my English, I ain’t a native speaker. Again, sorry for the whole book I wrote.

  • Can you do one one coming on too strong? Scary people away by intensely liking them? Do you struggle with obsession over being attracted to someone? Not in a relationship, but just desperately wanting someone to like you back

  • really relate to your videos. Im 19 and expecting my second child and alwaya find my BPD and body issues flare up so much more when pregnant but watching your videos makes me feel less alone with it. i know how much of a struggle it is daily so thankyou for being strong and making these videos x

  • Thanks Noknow! Something told me to clip on this video, haven’t check for you in a while. Music is and has always been my savior. Grew up Christian but not religious and Music has sustain me in a way my religion has not. So I thank you! And damn I need to vacation where you are. Lol it is gorgeous. Be well my friend!

  • man this almost put me i tears i have always seek wanted approval and acceptance of other people i never think about me i’ve always hated myself but this make me see things different

  • Hi, Katie! I enjoyed all your videos and it helped me a lot on coping up with anxiety and depression. How do we gain back our trust to ourselves when we do have big trust issue? #KatiFAQ

  • Shit we DID DO, like cosigning a loan for a now deviant nephew and being $60,000 in debt SIGH I feel like I’m being punished for being a nice person….
    LOL “This felt like granola”

    I’m trying EMDR for the next few months in therapy, it’s very interesting, it has helped even in “Normal life” and I am happy to have more tools in my coping kit:)

    This is a great video Noah, thank you:)

  • I’m having the worst two weeks of my life right now. It’s hard to take care of myself during this time, but that line about doing the best for my future self really makes me want to try. Even if it doesn’t necessarily happen tonight or tomorrow, I want to keep going, to get out of my bed, actually eat and drink something, and keep going with my life if only so my future self can thrive.

  • Kindness to myself I have troubles doing much to my friends like Gentleness to myself I can sorta do this sometimes, Self-love that went out the window when I started cutting.

    Self-hate I do every anxiety destroys any kind of social interactions depression ruins my class times cause I have no motivation.

    But when I am sitting in my room yelling hateful things at myselfa friend sent me this video since he knows I enjoy asmr.

  • LOL I have the same experience but am flat chested! This coincides with my jealousy over my current boyfriend’s ex, who I feel my boyfriend loves more who has a better boobs, and wears tons of makeup, etc




  • Kati, I love your youtube vids and all but girl, you need to start creating podcasts so I can tune in when I’m working out or driving to/from work!!!!!! PLEASE CREATE A PODCAST FOR YOUR CHANNELLLLL!!!!! PLEASEEEEE, I’m begging you:'(

    kthnxbaiii (lots of love!! <3)

  • Great video. Thank you Noah, I learn so much from your videos. You are so real which makes your words really so impactful bc you aren’t pretending to have it all together every day. Plus, your videos always pop up exactly at the perfect time for me. Thanks again for your work on these videos. I really appreciate you.

  • I have a friend who I kno has BPD even tho she has been falsely diagnosed with bipolar…EVERYTINE we will go to the mall she has to buy EVERYTHING I buy…she has to constantly wear what I wear…..sometimes it’s flattering but sometimes it gets to b too much

  • This is so beautiful. I’m currently at the hospital and have to stay here for a few days, because I had a surgery, a really sudden one since we didn’t know that it was such an emergency. Since that was very stressful and a side effect of the medication I’m on is “Depression”, I really felt bad (especially about myself) and cried basically the whole day today. But this video helps so much. Your voice calms me down and the words you say make me feel motivated and really happy. I’m really thankful for that, I don’t know how I would get through the days here without the peace and rest that I get from your videos. I just really wanna give you a big warm hug, because I’m so so thankful and I wanna give you the same nice feelings like you give others. Is that weird? �� I hope you get my point. Thank you so much, really. <3

  • Thank you rainy
    You are doing such an amazing job ; helping us get through our insecurities
    You deserve every good thing in life ❤❤

  • Woke up this morning and all I could think of were my past mistakes and people who have a more successful life than I have (well, what is success?). Your video made me realize that things can be different. Thank you.

  • Welp fuck I’m crying now. Thank you for this, Rainy. I’ve gone through a bunch of therapists for like 7 years and none of them have told me to do this sort of thing.
    Not sayin I’m gonna depend on your audios as an alternative, but it sure as hell does help.

  • Dear Katie! I hate myself! I grew up as an adopted child; I have been adopted by the age of 8 and before that I was in two children center and in lots of care families. When I finally got adopted, I could never do something right for my Mum! As I grew older I wasn’t even allowed to touch the washing maschine or the oven etc. I wasn’t even allowed to learn how to handle financial things,cause my Mum had all the power and she thought I would break the washing maschine and wouldn’t be able to learn how to deal financial things anyway. And til this day, I am 42 now, I can’t do anything right in her eyes! I talked to her on the phone again,after a two month break. I wanted to tell her that I am in real health danger,cause of the mistake my therapist did with my medication and that I am in real danger and have to take care of myself really,really good cause stress, too much activity could kill me and I have a broken heart syndrome! She understood nothing! It was all about her and how badly I treat her if I don’t talk to her or pull of my phone so she can call me! After this talk with her on the phone, I became a heartbeat like a Formula 1 car and had breathing problems. Then I was making my fiances bed and I passed out! I was lucky though,cause I passed out on the matrasse of his bed,but it could have ended very dangerous for me if I for example fell with my head on the corner of his bed. I was totally alone and he just came back from work at about 10:45pm and it happened about 3pm. How can I learn to love myself, when I was being told my whole life I can’t do anything right??? I fight, but more often than not I loose! Do you have any advice for me,dear Katie? I would highly appreciate it! Be blessed in all you do! Love from me, Manuela, to you dearest Katie! Take care! <3 <3 <3

  • Does Rotogenflux Methods (google it) help me increase my IQ of 22 points? I notice many people keep on speaking about this intelligence boost program.

  • I love you Kati(not in a creepy weirdo on the internet kind of way). More like a, I need your advice on a daily basis kind of way.

  • this is great cause i think lots of people want to love themselves but they don’t know how. I also think that there is a lot of misinformation out there on how to do it. Thanks for this video Katie ��

  • well i have to wait until 2019 to get my dream job but i do have a new power i can share so that should help me out a bit

    thx for this ha bisky vid i love these videos so much telepathic communication is so awesome TYT has proof i have it i even tried to contact them when i was in section 12 but the single gets blocked very easily and it sucks its why i have a hard time hearing my cousin when he was trying to use it on me when he was in a similar situation

    i am just happy to know when i got out i did annoy them and that was payback (i interrupted ana while she was having dinner with her husband) if she didnt want me to do that she shouldnt have been in on marcs plan

  • its so weird for me to find people that felt all of the sames things i do. for so long ive felt like i was the only one who knew what was happening to me. It sucks anyone else has felt/feels all these horrible feelings but at least im not alone.

  • My favourite thing you said is the affirmation which says I’m ok just the way I am right now. Don’t need to add anything.
    I try affirmations a lot but they don’t seem to work.. I’m unfortunately in a situation where everyone around me is doing great in life except for me. Comparing doesn’t make things easier.. and it gets harder when you’re a (single) parent teaching your child how to be happy and how to not compare themselves to others when secretly you do.

  • Thank you Noah, for creating this message of positivity that is not only uplifting and encouraging, but that is also grounded in reality and actionable advice.

    Also, the fact that this video was endorsed by a representative of the mighty Seagull Empire is impressive. You should be proud.

    (I mean, they don’t send send out their official ambassadors for just ANYONE, you know?) ����

  • I don’t even know what love feels like anymore.. I feel like I’m stuck in a hole of self-hate and depression.. Her words brought me to tears.. it sounds like great ideas but I still don’t know how to make myself feel better.. thank you though!

  • MY friend was talking negative things about herself and I said don’t say that about my best friend she is amazing in my life so I shared this vid with her

  • Self-love is the #1 thing I appreciate the video! I discuss the same idea in the last video in my channel, from a parenting context. I hope videos like ours really inspire people to prioritize self-love!

  • ….Damn it.
    It really is super hard for me to believe something like this. ��

    <.< >°>; However, I do hear you….And:
    Helllloooooo REM cycle affirmation! �� sneaks audio onto my otherwise innocuous sleeptime playlist, so that I’ll hear it when I’m not awake or lucid enough to reject it properly. ��

  • I prolly have the lowest self esteem ever. I don’t like myself at all. i don’t like how i look, how i dress, how i talk, i hate everything about me.

  • I felt better after hearing this��
    I kept shivering cause your words hit me too hard like damn I didn’t realize that I actually deserve things.

  • I love you, yes I don’t know who are you
    But l love you
    bcz when people can hate someone they don’t then I can love a stranger too ❤️

  • I feel like my parents are not loving me enough, they are expecting me to be a good student in school. They dong care about my goal and passion, they only want me to study. This is my problem with my parents. They are my fear. If I get low Mark’s, my mind and heart will br super nervous, I get thoughts like “my mom is gonna kill me”
    Why am I feeling like this?

  • I went to a therapist a few times and eventually went to a med eval to get medicated. The lady that was prescribing the meds to me basically told me that the way I feel is my fault. I tried to view that in a positive way but I can’t bring myself to go back. In a sense she’s right. I don’t have any trauma that I know of and so I should be fine. I don’t know what’s wrong with me

  • What therapies like ACT get wrong, demonstrated by a simple recipe for happiness.
    Essential to all psychotherapies is the principle that core affect (feeling bad or good) is dependent upon restructuring what one thinks about, or the ‘normative’ aspects of experience. However, for the field of affective neuroscience, core affect is instead dependent upon ‘how’ one thinks, or the ‘abstract’ aspects of experience. If this is true, then the personal control of positive affect can effectively bypass psycho-therapeutic interventions and make ‘happiness’ simply a matter of rearranging abstract aspects of one’s perceptual world. The virtue of this approach is its simplicity, predictive power, and testability, so it has a low shelf life if wrong. An exemplar of this is a ‘recipe for happiness’ proposed below.

    In affective neuroscience, it is well known that behaviors that involve continuous high and positive act/outcome discrepancy (gaming, gambling, creative work) correspond to elevated dopaminergic activity and a feeling of arousal, but not pleasure. However, for many individuals engaging in similar activity, a feeling of pleasure is also reported, but only when their covert musculature is inactive (i.e., a state or rest). Because relaxation activates opioid systems, and tension inhibits them, it is postulated that dopaminergic activity stimulates opioid activity, but only during resting states.
    This hypothesis can be easily tested and is described in greater detail below. If correct, it will demonstrate for the first time that elevated and sustained arousal and pleasure, or ‘eudaemonia’ or ‘happiness’ can be induced easily through simple modifications of abstract perceptual properties of behavior that anyone can easily do throughout the day.

    Opioid and dopamine systems represent bundles of neurons or ‘nuclei’ in the mid brain that are respectively responsible for the affective states of pleasure and attentive arousal, and sub-serve the neural processes that govern motivation.
    Eating and drinking, having sex, and relaxing or resting all activate opioid systems, whereas the anticipation or experience of positive act-outcome discrepancy (or positive surprises or meaning) activate dopamine systems.
    Taking our pleasures increases our attentive arousal, and increasing our attentive arousal accentuates our pleasure. If these systems are concurrently activated both are accentuated or affectively ‘bootstrapped’, as both pleasure and attentive arousal will be higher due to their synergistic effects.
    As characterized by the well documented ‘flow response’ (pp.82-86), consistently applied contingencies that elicit pleasurable resting states and consistent attentive arousal result in self-reports of heightened pleasure and energy. This emotional experience can be easily replicated by simultaneously applied contingencies that elicit rest (mindfulness protocols) and meaning (imminent productive behavior and its uniform positive implications). To achieve complete rest and accentuate positive affect, these contingencies must be applied for periods of at least a half hour or more. Just as one sets meditative sessions to last for a set time period and frequency to be effective, so mindfulness and meaning sessions must be similarly arranged, with cumulative sessions if possible charted to provide proper feedback of efficacy. Finally, the intensity of positive affect will scale to the importance or salience of moment to moment meaningful behavior, with the more meaningful the task the higher the pleasurable affect.
    Affect is as much an aspect of how information is arranged as what information is, or the abstract rather than normative properties of behavior. It follows that as a positively affective state, happiness is not just a product of what we think, but how we think, and derives not only from our pleasures but also from our incentives. Positive incentives can accentuate those very pleasures that we wish to maximize, and conversely, associated pleasure will increase the ‘appetitive value’ or ‘liking’ of incentives (or in other words, increase the value of productive work), and all sustained by simple choices within our grasp, as is ultimately happiness itself.
    I offer a more detailed explanation in pp. 47-52, and pp 82-86 of my open source book on the neuroscience of resting states, ‘The Book of Rest’, linked below.
    This above book is based on the research of the distinguished neuroscientist Kent Berridge of the University of Michigan, a preeminent researcher and authority on dopamine, addiction, and motivation, who was kind to vet the work for accuracy and endorse the finished manuscript.
    Berridge’s Site
    Meditation and Rest
    from the International Journal of Stress Management, by this author

  • I love chocolate hagandaz ice cream and your right. I ate a half a gallon of belgium chocolate ice cream two pints of chocolate chip ice cream and one pint of chocolate gelato in one week and I didn’t put on a pound, loving it, so your right, ha ha

  • Call me a religious zealot, but this self love talk is a disease, we as people are the problems of this world but we have Christ that loved us so much that he died for our sins. Self-love is temporary in this disordered world, just my 2 cents.

  • I just found your channel. I have been dealing with intrusive thoughts since 2008. I was able to overcome it as I just kept moving forward (hard as hell) but I relapsed in 2015 after watching a scene in a movie that brought all those thoughts back. Since 2015, I’ve been on and off (2016 good, 2017 not so good, 2018 good, and so on). My main issue is that even when Im not obsessing over thoughts, my brain gets into emergency mode, I get anxiety and the anxiety causes me physical pain. Have you experienced this? Anyhow, thanks for your videos. Im going to keep looking into your older videos. I have never looked for help, but I’m more open to do so. Do you have any advice on how to start looking for help? Thanks again. What you are doing is great!

  • Where’s the shame for our people
    Dying in the streets by the millions and/or
    Living out of cars? I know body shame is a thing but it seems indulgent to me. If you want to go to true heart core go to the love for all we were born with and adopt a person into your family that’s been ejected from theirs—a homeless person. You’ll learn a lot more about love and yourself that way.

  • For whoever reads this✨: You are worthy. You are smart. You are capable. You are beautiful. You matter. You freaking rock! Now go spread your magic light��✨�� This is a sign, follow your heart, be your awesome self, the world needs just you�� ps. small youtuber here✨��

  • Know your value before it’s too late. Yeah they say it’s never too late. The more time you take the more hard it’ll become. So, make sure you look after yourself. Fck negative people’s opinions. Have a way to operate and everything is going to be fine. I am the greatest person ever. Be positive.

  • I do love myself. I got surgery recently so I had to take a break for a while. I’ve been being independent, taking care of myself, getting back in shape, going to the gym & working out. My body is the skinny and athletic type and I’m happy in my own skin. Every woman in the world should have the belief she is beautiful and love yourself more. Don’t let anybody weather partners or not tell you any differently. If they do, kick them to the curb. You are enough as you are.

  • I have problems with my GF about this, she really hates herself and I am trying to say that you just have to face it and understand what is it that you hate about yourself and then just try to do something opposite about it. Constantly repeating that it’s not something that would happen on a snap, it will take time, but it requires dedication. I once got out of it myself…mostly I have gotten out of problems just by myself, like overcoming the wishes of suicide at early age in secondary school times, I thought about many “what if” scenarios, about to whom I would matter, but then I figured and thought about reasons not to do it, because I had this thing at even younger age, that I do not want to hurt others because I dislike the pain that others are causing me, thus I do not want to cause same pain to anyone else, because I understand it. Probably that set of mind was what restricted me of actually committing suicide. Then I realized, that my mom loves me, all the things she has done, and if I would die, what would she do then? What would relatives do? I couldn’t just do it and then I quit thinking about it, I just tried to survive it all and was thinking about finishing and getting out of that school, that was my motivation to survive, but I wasn’t motivated enough to get through studies, so I got through it in…a bit different ways so to say, looking for reasons to skip exams etc. which I did with the help of therapists and doctors.

    After that, everything went up little by little. It was the school that gave me depression, anxiety issues, traumas, hate, all the negative bullshit, I blame my class mates and educational system, because I was bullied. I still am affected by it all, or…not affected but I still have those scars, I still have depression, I still feel anxiety for almost everything, or maybe not everything, but one of those are social anxiety definitely, but I am trying slowly to go through it, figuring it all myself. I literally came up myself with these solutions or facts that currently I stumble upon you mentioning in these videos, about looking for things that make me feel better, because I don’t want to feel like shit, it’s tiresome, it’s not helping.

    Where my GF is pretty stubborn about it, maybe a bit ignorant, thinking that she is falling down more and more, all sorts of depressing things going on (which I can see actually and are not self-demotivational, imagined in head things, but actually having hard times right now), she feels she doesn’t deserve the kindness I and her friends are giving her, and doesn’t feel a need to become better, because she thinks that a “shit” like her is not worth the effort of becoming better, that she just doesn’t want it. The problems always lie in the fact that you, as a person, you do not want to do something, but you have to tell yourself that you want to do it, you need to do it, you have to do it in order to begin trying, or at least begin from the fact, that you are self aware of these issues and then figuring that it’s just bad to have these issues and should be dealt with and fought off of them. But she is very caring for others, she is trying her best to do something good for others, just…I wish she would do the same to herself.

    I am trying my best, and I want to help her as much as I can, trying to talk sense into her and hoping I am doing it properly, or right in order to not lead her to wrong path or hate me, or push me away. Personally I have anxiety from being rejected, so that’s my fear of pushing people, since I have met a lot of stubborn people that become arrogant when someone is trying to push their boundaries when trying to talk sense into them. I am sharing lots of relatable your kind of videos to her, and those TEDx videos as well where people are talking from experience. But she just have her opinions and thinks she is more…”special kind” of person by probably imagining that there is no solution to her problems, but I am dedicated in showing her that she is wrong about it all, but only if she allows me to by sticking by my side, because my meaning of live is to live for someone else, so I am dedicating myself to that one person.

    Plus, she feels guilt as well, and responsible for something, almost everything, she hates her just that much. She had a rough childhood, and I understand it.
    Personally I do not hate myself, but I have my issues as well that I am trying to overcome, turning from ugly duckling into a swan or something like that, so I can bare the guilt, carry the weight of her problems, because I know, or I think I know that I can absorb it and turn into something better, where for her the problem carrying idea is…problematic, she doesn’t know how to convert it, or something like that, because of all the issues and self hatred she has.

    Is there maybe someone with similar experience that you could suggest additionally?

  • This was an awesome amazing message. Didn’t sleep again but today I will accept where I am and try to be gentle with myself. Maybe I can sleep today after I do affirmation and journal. Thanks so much for the video.

  • Ya know -I hate to respond you are a perfect person and ne like me. I worry about you. I Pray for you. It’s now 1/2/20 and I do t have it figured out bit ima start. I think your amazing. You need to stop. Jist stop. Makes me sick ima hug u when I see you –

  • Thank you 4 everything you post Noah mental health issues is very serious but we will overcome this evil that try’s 2 keep us down I love you guys all of you and Please love your self……..

  • When I sent a message saying “im depressed” I immediately saw 1111 beside that message. And here I am after crying so bad my throat hurts to the point i cant speak

  • 4:35. You’re definitely not bad looking in a straight males opinion. I think you look better than me by 70% so id say to women you are handsome

  • I love you bro I’ve been struggling with alcohol my whole life, and just listening to you talk about your mental health and struggles helps so much. You don’t understand the impact you have on a lot of people’s life’s man. Thank you so much ♥️

  • Making a pact with myself. I am practicing self love and my self worth to become better and do better. I am manifesting and claiming the steps that Jen said to practice and I will do. I receive it! ❤️����✨

  • My therapist asked me a question and I answered with “because I don’t like myself” she said she knew “I knew you’d say that” she told me what you’ve said here. Just let the thoughts pass, don’t obsess over it.

  • Thank so much for these videos. I stumbled upon your channel a few days ago and it’s so healing to know others have been through and go through the same things, and that there is light at the end of the tunnel. I would really love to know how you got access to DBT? I’m just about to finish a 16 week program of CAT therapy, which has been so helpful. However, because I’m currently single (and have been for two years) I’ve not addressed some of the issues I have relating to romantic relationships. I know they will crop up again if I let anyone else in. Anyway, thanks again so much and sending love to you.

  • I once ever had this kind of thought when people around me being supportive towards me even friends that I’m not that close with. I started questioning, did I deserve this? They were so genuine but I felt like I might disappoint or hurt them someday and break that trust because I was not as good as they thought I was. I was glad that I could talk about this to my best friends and they reassured me that I deserved it and everything would be fine. Thank you so much for the reminder, Rainy:)

  • thank you so much for what you do, I didn’t realize that other people have it the way i do too.. Im a 19 year old male and im about to become a Dad on Oct 18th so I’m quite worried as to how my mental heath could effect my baby over the years to come… but after watching a few of your videos you have awoken something in me that I have thought to have died a while ago, thank you sooo much for sharing! please never stop, I think this could really help a ton of people.

  • I really love the idea of thanking mind & body. It’s something I’ve been thinking of trying for a while because it will help me to cope with a long-term health condition I’m currently battling.

  • I have recently just started to follow some of your videos. I recently broke up with a man that I love who struggles with alcohol. It is so nice to see you looking happy and healthy. These videos help others out there. Thank you.

  • We all hate somethings about what we done and ourselves and we need to forgive ourselves. Enjoy your vacation and keep on the right path.

  • hi noah you’re really a positive person and i think you deseve only the best from the life. I saw a few videos of your channel and i say to you never give up my friend. Depression has been a great enemy of mine and anxiety is my actual faithful companion and often i suffer panic attacks but I’m fighting like a warrior because you gave me energy to go ahead and for that i thank you buddy.������������������������������������������������������������������������✌✌✌✌✌✌✌✌��������������������������������������������������������������������������������������Anyway you’re in an excellent shape and your efforts will be rewarded for helping other persons. Believe me bro. I will continue to follow you on your youtube channel and my support is all for you my friend. I appreciate you for what you’re doing here. Much respect.

  • Humans are the only creatures removed enough from God (your source in whatever way works for you) to hate ourselves. Even roaches don’t hate themselves. If you can read this, you are closer to God than you give yourself credit for. Definitely closer than a roach. ��
    Love yourself as is today. You were built for it. You deserve it. I love you. ♥️����

  • I really appreciate what you’re doing and you helped me in deciding to go on trt. 3 weeks ago, my doctor started me off at 200 mg a week of testosterone cyp. The first week I felt great, had tons of energy and about mid way through the second week I started feeling lethargic. From your experience, do you have any thoughts on why this is happening?

  • I need help please tell me how to get in a psychiatric hospital before I give up my battle with bullies, being transgender, depression, OCD, Cyclothymia, social anxiety and self esteem issues I can’t take this world anymore. I won’t to die. Then no one will worry about me and no one will. I mean it’s not like anyone loves me anyway. My mum doesn’t believe in mental illness. My dad think all trans people are freaks and should be institutionalised. I can’t talk to my brothers about anything because they hate me. My half sister has her own family to worry about without me adding to the pile. Both my grandads are dead. my grandad in law works for Samaritans so it makes it harder to tell him. My grandma lives nowhere near me. My mums side of the family live nowhere near me. My dads side of the family are to old school. And my cousins live abroad. PLEASE HELP ME IM DESPERATE!! From a suicidal thirteen year old boy that no one loves.

  • Recently found your channel and your videos seem to give me a bit of relief. I have struggled all of my life and I’m to a point where I am just exhausted. I really have realized how insignificant I am in the grand scheme. I feel very alone and in the darkness right now and a few points that you made in your videos have really made sense to me. Thank you

  • Not sure how to be kind to myself. A few months ago, before my 53rd birthday, I got my diagnosis of Asperger’s Tendencies. Suddenly, my entire life makes sense, from nobody wanting to be my friends, to not getting or keeping the job, to the various scam artists who took me for a ride, to my physically and psychologically abusive ex-wife.

    While the past makes sense, the future makes no sense, because there IS NOT a cure for Asperger’s Tendencies, that thing which gets in the way of EVERYTHING that I need to do if I am going to survive in the modern age as a supposedly self-sufficient adult.

    I can’t baby myself, when I’m a walking shit show.

    What do “close friends” say? I wouldn’t know. Never had any.

  • I watched a video you did about depression and thought about when I was at the gym it helped me get through my whole day thanks friend

  • There is a stillness, a peacefulness I see in you…it’s Grace…. I’m so in awe with your commitment of of enhancing the you you always were… your a beautiful spirit my love…blessed that your in my life����❤️����. Your mama

  • I know exactly why I don’t like myself. In my mind I am very critical of myself (weight, wrinkles, baldness, flabby body, awkward interactions…). I wear an emotional mask so that other people only see me in a positive way. I am not genuine or authentic. If people knew who I really was, they would not like me. I am clever but I am not very smart. I’m ugly and I have to make up for that by exercising my body. I eat too much and if I didn’t exercise so much I would be fat, ugly, awkward and selfish. I have been trying to find good things to focus on so I can start liking myself. I seem to be able to easily like other people even when they do bad things but I cannot do the same for myself. I’m weird.

  • Might be a bit off topic.
    But the title made me think about a bit what I have gone through.
    It has taken me 9years to love myself. Talking to someone her advice was “it has nothing to do with you, something they wish they had”.
    Going back nine years when I first met my husband’s sister the first thing she said was about how beautiful his ex is, ect. After five years together I found out his mom and sisters never wanted my husband to marry me.
    Short story I learned to stand up for myself. I quit tolerating there behavior-ex excluding our boys, they go to the park, zoo, ect.
    I took them off mt FB page, no contact (for the most part), ect.
    Slowly I am healing.

  • i hate thinking oh i’m just acting jealous. I hate living. I want to believe I am enough so bad but time after time again nothing goes right. You learn from it but NOTHING CHANGES. My two bestfriends in the entire world hang out everyday without me and never invite me. I tell them all the time just because I don’t live by you doesn’t mean I can’t hang out. They still don’t invite me. It makes me feel worthless and like they don’t even actually like me. My sister went to the mental hospital and was there for just under a month for the second time and the whole time no one asks me if i’m okay. I think about it all the time that the average cost of a funeral is 7000. My dad doesn’t have the money to even give me a funeral. I could easily go in my kitchen and overdose on pills right now. I don’t because of that. There is something deep down that keeps me from doing it. I hate it here. No one really cares. I have a lot of friends but my mind doesn’t realize that. I am desperate for validation and i don’t get it. I just want SOMEONE TO LOVE ME. My mom chooses my stepdad that abuses her over me and my sister. My dad has severe depression and comes crying in my room a lot. I have friends but it’s the fact that i’m no ones first choice that makes me want to stop everything. I want something to motivate me. I want someone to say I’m their favorite. I just want everything to go away. Maybe it will. I’m more confident that I won’t make it another year than I am I’ll get a 30/100 on my math test.

  • I always thought being a chameleon was normal… Until now.. Haven’t been diagnosed yet but I have many symptoms. I have no clue who I am. I also don’t know where to even start with that.. Ugh I’m a mess!

  • trying to find the right channel, so far i am really liking this (love misdirection humor, not sure why). I am going to try this. Thank you,

  • Spot on Noah. Self discipline is key to feeling good about yourself. If you don’t have self discipline and you know you should, you’ll feel guilty and then start with self sabotage. It then becomes very difficult to pull yourself out of that hole.

  • I love �� Me

    -Take Care Of Body
    -Be Committed To The Ambitions & Passions You Want
    -Read/listen to motivated videos/Make Time For God & You
    -Be True to Yourself & Serve God & Find Happiness with yourself & god

  • hey luv,question: when did you start changing and appreciating yourself as is? you come off as confident now which is brilliant,i do wanna start dpd therapy, i looked into it and it looks interesting, especially the “focus on the moment” aspect of it! x